Go jokes
Roses are red, violets are blue, You make me pee like I drink tea, you make me go buzz, like becoming a fuzz.
It sticks in, but it goes to the bin, after its use, it will be reused, no it is not what your thinking its -~-(clay)-~-
I got pranked so many times. Once I saw two wheels rolling down the street. I heard this noise. I looked behind me. There's a legless man in a wheelless chair screaming, "HELP! I CAN'T GO ANYWHERE!" but I walked away. I knew it was a prank.
Bob: Hey bud, remember we're going to space!
Carol: Really? I forgot to planet.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite childhood song? "The wheels on the chair go round and round....."
Little Johnny walked into class with a black eye, and the teacher said, "Why do you have a black eye?"
Johnny said, "Well, me and my parents have to share a bed, and my dad asked me if I was asleep and I said no, so he smacked me."
The teacher said, "Well tonight, don't say anything."
The next day, Johnny walked in with another black eye, and the teacher said, "Why do you have another black eye?" Little Johnny said, "Well, last night, I did what you said and didn't say anything when my dad asked me if I was asleep. A few minutes later, my dad said he was coming, and my mom said she was coming too. They usually don't go anywhere without me so I said 'Wait for me, I'm coming too.'"
Two lions plan their escape from the circus. The night they get out of their cages, they see a lone clown stumbling back from town, drunk, not a soul in sight. Since they are going on the run, they decide to catch one last meal before they hit the road.
As one lion gets a bite of leg, the second takes a piece of shoulder.
Then one stops and asks his companion:
"Does this taste funny to you?"
Why did Hitler go for handicap?
Because they can’t stand up for themselves.
The pilot goes "We're going down!"
The other pilot yells "Down like your syndrome?"
Why didn’t Stephen Hawking go to heaven?
He couldn’t climb the stairway.
What do you call people who go to space? Icetronauts lolololol hahahahah.
Why did the deer go to the dentist?
It had buck teeth.
I got my math test back today. I am Asian and raised in an Asian household, so I was worried about what I was going to get.
I got a 95%.
I'm having warm dinner tonight!
P.S. True story, lol.
Whenever I’m bored, I hit up my local orphanage and beat some of them up.
I mean honestly, what are they going to do, tell their parents? 😂😂
The moment when you tell an illegal immigrant to go home and he walks to the jail cell and closes it.
Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?
Because he didn't have the guts to do it.
Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.
Why did Joe get hit by a bus? Sally was driving it.
Where did Sally go during the bombing? Everywhere!
What do dogs do when they lose their tail?
They go to the retail store.
Why don't orphan criminals go to jail?
Because they weren't even wanted.
I hate it when I go to the shop and people are like, "Oh, hey what are you doing here?"
Me: "Oh, you know, just hunting elephants."
Q: What kind of club do roosters go to? A: The Chicken Strip.
I made that one up.