Go jokes
A wife and husband go to a barn. The husband picks up a goat and says, “Look at this pig I have to sleep with every night.”
The wife says, “Honey, that’s a goat.”
The husband replies with, “I was talking to the goat.”
Friend: Your t-shirt is cringe.
Me: You should go get the Covid test because one of their symptoms is no taste.
What do you think is going through kids' heads during school shootings? Bullets.
Why go across the street when you can just go down the hall, lol?
You want to know what the ugly truth looks like? Go look in the mirror.
I remember my uncle's last words:
"I don't think we're going shooting today."
My wife and I were at the park with our little princess today.
We decided to go back home, then some jerk had the nerve to shout, "Stop those two! They have my daughter!"
An attractive man and a blonde meet in an elevator.
"Where are you heading today?" the man asks.
"I'm going down to give blood."
"How much do you get paid for giving blood?"
"About $30."
"Wow," says the man, "I'm going up to donate sperm, and the sperm bank pays $100."
The woman, slightly annoyed, gets off the elevator. The next day, the man and woman meet in the elevator again.
"Fancy meeting you again. Where you off to today?"
"Sperm bank," she mumbles with her mouth full.
A police pulls over a Mexican man trying to get into America. The Mexican man comes up with some sob story and the police say, "All right, all right ok," says the police, "I'll let you go if you can come up with a sentence that has the words green, pink, and yellow in it." The Mexican thought about it long and hard for almost 45 minutes and then the police says, "Ok ok let's hear it" after waiting impatiently. The Mexican said, "Ok ok don't rush me. I'm ready." The Mexican replied, "Ok when my phone green green, I pink it up and say Yellow!"
Why did the other Down syndrome guy say to the other Down syndrome guy?
What is going on here?
Breakfast! 😂
What do ants and Michael Jackson have in common? They go in kids' pants.
I am a racist, and I put my milk before cereal. Well, to be honest, that was when I had milk, but one day my dad says he was going to get some... then he left.
Now when I see a black guy, I yell, "Thanks for picking the cotton to make my shirt!"
Why did the math book go to the psychologist?
It had too many problems.
If you go broke, you could always rent parking garages on your huge ass forehead.
An orphan entered the high school for the first time. He has no knowledge of the school. He went to the secretary and asked where he shall go. The secretary then gave the orphan a schedule and said to the orphan, “Where is homeroom?” The secretary then asked which homeroom number he was assigned, and he said "1." The orphan then started to weep and said that his parents died right as he stole his first base in baseball.
Do you like Wendy’s?
Yeah, Wendy’s nuts finna go in your mouth!
Please help, my dad is an addict. He won't stop, and he eats my food.
Sometimes I think, should I kill him? But nah, he will go down with the others who did that too.
Why do emo people go to the store with no money?
Because they just scan their bar code and get everything free.
Go fuck yourself, cause I doubt anyone else will. 💅
Where did Suzy go during the bombing?
Everywhere.