Go jokes
How do you know someone is going to die?
He can't stop coughing. (coffin)
My stepdad has stage 4 cancer and is going through chemotherapy... at least he saves money on shampoo and conditioner.
Skedaddle skedoodle, I'm gonna go beat my noodle.
A man and a boy were walking through a dark forest. The boy said, “I’m scared.” The man said, “Why are you scared? I’m the one who’s going to leave these woods alone.”
What did the salad say to the chef? LETTUCE GO!!!
Memes
Kid: My parents want to meet you, you wanna come over?
Orphan: Na, I'm good. I'm going to watch Home Alone. It's the only movie that I can think of that's related to me.
When the teacher dismissed the class to go home,
The orphan asked, "Where do I go?"
The teacher replied, "Home."
The orphan said, "Catch me on the streets then!"
Why did the 18-year-old girl need a ladder to go to school?
Because it was High School.
What did the baseball chief say to the Orphan?
GO HOME!
A man once sued smart water for not making him smart. Then a woman replied, “Okay cool, now I’m going to go sue Thin Mints for not making me thin.”
"Did you go to the biscuit eating championship?"
"Yea, it was crackers!"
If a kid refused to go to bed, does that make them guilty of resisting a rest?
I'm about to go to the orphanage to tell yo mama jokes.
My mom said, "You are in big trouble!"
I said, "Are you going to punish me?"
Why did the MOSFET go to jail?
It had a charge for battery.
Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon?
Because she'll let it go!
Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? Because he had no body to go with.
Tell someone that you're gonna say “I 1 poopoo” and it will go in order of numbers, so they say, “I 2 poopoo” & so on:
You) I 1 poopoo
(Them) I 2 poopoo
(You) I 3 poopoo
(Them) I 4 poopoo
(You) I 5 poopoo
(Them) I 6 poopoo
(You) I 7 poopoo
(Them) I 8 poopoo
And be like, “You ate poopoo??! EWW!!”
The little girl's dad was Jewish and her mom was Catholic. Mom had been taking the little girl to church every Sunday.
One Sunday, during High Mass, the little girl whispers to her mom, “Mom, can we go home now?”
“No honey, not yet,” replied the mother, “the Mass is only half over.”
“Then we can go now, Mom. I'm half Jewish.”
I dated a lot of girls before I married my wife. I was living with one of them when I arrived home one day to find her bags packed and next to the door. I asked her, "Baby, what's going on?" She said, "I'm leaving you."
"But why?" I replied.
"Because you're a pedophile!" she answered.
"That's a pretty big word for a six-year-old," I said.