I'm not saying I hate you. I'm just saying that if I could go back in time I'd give your mom a coat hanger.
If you wanna really know how to get under my skin, give me a razor and maybe we'll talk ;)
Expectation: Brr, I’m cold! Here brother! I’ll give you my jacket, I don’t want you to be cold!
Reality: Brr, I’m cold! Well, damn bro, I can’t control the weather.
I used to suffer from depression but through hard work, persistence, and never giving up..
I now suffer from anxiety aND depression :\
Give a blind kid a torch and tell him its a hairdryer.
People with down syndrome have a specific skill only they have, they can give a blow job and talk to you while sounding exactly the same.
a man was in a court room, the judge said, ''what should this mans punishment be?'' a random guy ''OFF WITH HIS HEAD'' judge ''he shall give head to every man in this room'' the guy ''WAIT THATS NOT WHAT I SAID!!!''
Three blondes were taking a walk when they stumbled on some tracks. They argued on what the tracks came from. One of them said “it’s a deer.” The other said it “No it’s a coyote.” The last one was going to give her thoughts, but that was when the train hit them.
Why does the catholic church have a glory hole inside the confessional booth? so a priest give a anonymous blowjob to another bisexual man or a gay man or a heterosexual man that has a big dick after the priest hears their confession
Am I the only one who gives people in the neighborhood names they don't know they have? Like "Blue truck dude", "Loud dog guy", "Nice old lady with the rose bushes", "That slut across the street",
A man was asked by his 21 years old daughter, " Dad how do you give a blowjob to a man that has a big "dick"? her father replied " honey, you should have watch me last night - it was inside my mouth, does it cycle now?"
A Pedophile pulls up to little Jonny, lowers his window and asks, “hey little boy, if I give you a Lolly will you come in my car?” Little Jonny, “give me the whole packet and I’ll come in your mouth”
The depressed kid at school tried giving the tree a high five
It left him hanging
What is the difference between Putin and Hilter. Putin no longer supplies gas and Hitler gives it away for free
I was walking down the streets of Manchester when suddenly I saw Penaldo getting arrested! I heard the officer say “This time I give you warning, there will be no penalty”
That’s when Penaldo asked “No penalty?!” and punched the police officer.
Shame on you Penaldo!
Q. what do you give a sick lemon
A.lemon Ade
give a man a fish feed him for a day
give a man a poison fish feed him for a lifetime
Q. What did Hitler give he's niece for her birthday A. An easy bake oven
Give a man a gun and he will rob a bank.
Give a man a bank and he will rob everyone.
Today, I dreamt about giving head to Johnny Depp. Then I woke up and realized that I forgot to roll my windows up when passing through the New Jersey Turnpike.
