Get jokes
How do you kill a spider?
Just get an autistic person.
So, my mom was talking to me and told me to go to the store. When I get there, there’s a sign, but then someone tells me that’s just someone with a ginormous forehead.
"I told my mom I thought parenting got easier as the kids get older, and she laughed so hard she cried a little."
"Why do cemeteries have fences around them? Because everyone's dying to get in!"
I couldn't figure out why the baseball kept getting larger. Then it hit me.
Why'd Biden get fired from the supermarket?
He kept telling little kids they smell like freshly baked bread.
What’s one thing Obama proved during his presidency?
No matter how far a brotha gets in life, he’s still going to have the cops on his back.
Why do golfers wear two pairs of pants?
In case they get a hole in one!
My son caught me masturbating. He asked me, "What are you doing?" and I said, "Don't worry, son, you'll be doing it soon." He asks, "Why is that?" and I said, "My arm's getting tired."
I made a deal with Satan. I would get a free pass to hell if I serve as a demon lord. So, see you guys at the end of times!
America get pranked lol.
Biden's penis is probably as big as the Twin Towers right now.
Oh wait...
Why did the orphan stop playing baseball?
He could never get a home run.
What did the South tower get instead of pepperoni pizza?
It got a bunch of plane.
Hey, what’s your favorite type of tomato? Mine is sun-dried tomato.
Get it? "Sun-dried" like "son died."
You know you’re getting fat when you sit in the bath, and the water in the bath rises.
Your mum is so overdue on eBay for £2 so she could get a male stripper.
How to get rid of non-vaccinators: call water a "dehydration vaccine."
Where do babies get baptized?
So the priest can wash their sex toys.
Your mamma is so dumb, she went to the dentist to get Bluetooth.
Just told Putin to get some b*tches.
Waiting for 3801 missiles to strike my house.