Get jokes
How it be when the new guy takes too long...
Hay Danny, it's me Johnny.
Johnny: Boss says to kill the guy in red. Point the gun at his head.
Danny: Ok, target locked. 3... 2... 1... bang.
Johnny: Danny, hope you did not get the man in red.
Danny: OH MY BRO FOR REALL.
Hear about the new restaurant called Karma?
There’s no menu: You get what you deserve.
Son: Dad, I'm gay.
Dad: I support you.
Son: I like you.
Dad: Get out and into my room!
Why did the koala cross the road to get to the other gum tree?
Why did the orphan get sent to the principal's office?
Because he punched dumbos like you people!
Memes
Chalie has an eating disorder, and he is shorter, so is his life, but he will never get a wife. He's a gay motherfucker who wants to be hit by a trucker?
Why do emo kids not get phones? Because the phone dies before them.
What’s the difference between apples and orphans? Apples actually get picked.
My friend just got hit by a car and is now in a wheelchair. He is getting bullied, but I don’t understand why he just can’t stand up for himself.
Are you a train because I want to get railed by you? ;)
What do clothes and emo kids have in common?
They both get hung.
Why’d the chicken cross the road?
To get choked and stroked by Mr. Big Bloke!
“We’ll choke and stroke, it ain’t no joke!”
I wish I was at a Western bar; then I would get shot.
So I had an idea: you and a friend go bar (pub (whatever you call it)) hopping and propose to said friend in each one so everyone buys you free drinks and you get drunk and have a great time.
What do hookers and porn stars have in common? They get paid for sex and get STD's.
What's a bonus of being an orphan?
You can't get homework.
Maybe we should stop talking about orphans, their parents will get ma... oh wait.
What do you get if a disabled person falls off a building? Mashed potatoes.
Why did the Twin Towers get mad?
They ordered pepperoni pizza, but got plane.
Amber Heard morning schedule:
- Wake up - Eat breakfast - Take a shit - Get out of bed - Shower