Get jokes

Friend: Your t-shirt is cringe.

Me: You should go get the Covid test because one of their symptoms is no taste.

How to kick a deaf person off the plane:

Step 1: Pretend to yell and get some friends to do it, too.

Step 2: Tell your friends to raise both of their hands.

Step 3: He's out of the plane on a parachute.

You get hit by a wave, but you don't get wet. Why?

You were hit by a shockwave!

A 17 year old pregnant Juanita flew all the way to NY from TX to get an abortion. Initially, she was denied the procedure because she wasn't COVID boosted, but after she explained the father was religious and wanted to be involved, they quickly resolved the threat.

These orphan jokes are getting old. I mean, seriously, haven't you got something better to tell?

Okay, 19 dollar Fortnite card. Who wants it?

And yes, I’m giving it away. Remember: Share, share, share! And trolls: Don’t get BLOCKED!

What did the dad say to the kid?

Nothing, he went to get the milk.

I hate it when couples get into a little fight and they change their Facebook status to "single." I have fights with my parents, but I don't change my Facebook status to "orphan."

Friend: Slavery isn't good.

Other friend: Yeah, it's terrible.

Me: Shut up and get me a juice!

I want to be like pizza so I can get cut into 8 pieces.

Girls are like stones.

The flat ones get skipped.

Bully: My d*ck is longer than your password.

Me: Sorry mate, it's so short, get a longer one! 🤣

What do you get when you gobble down sweets?

Why do orphans love table tennis? Because that is the only love they're getting.

A man and a child walk into the woods. The child turns to the man and says, "Mister, can we go home? It's getting late, and I'm scared to walk home."

The man turns to the child and says, "How do you think I feel? I have to walk home alone!"

Yo momma's so skinny that even Flat Stanley gets jealous!

Mom: Son, get up for school.

Son: I AM UP *holds up books and says I'm up* IM UP MOM!

Q: Why is the graveyard so noisy? A: Because all the coffin.

If you don't get it, it means because of people coughing.

Next time you get a call from anybody, say, "Hi, welcome to Dave's orphanage. You make them, we take them. How may I help you?"

Or,

"Hi, welcome to Pizza and Abortion clinic, your loss is our sauce!"

Why are orphans and bananas so much alike? Because they both get split.