Fucking jokes

What do Boy Scouts and IG models have in common?

They both be fucking sugar daddies.

Lil Nas X is so gay, I would fuck him in the Old Town Road.

"Fuck you, do something about it!"

I AM FUCKING HAPPY AS HELL.

What did Satin say to God??

"Bitch, what the fuck you looking at?"

One time I fucked this chick so hard, she almost came back to life.

I fucked a wall.

You know you're fucked when the speed bump screams.

If this pops up on your timeline, fuck you!

Timmy: Stupid motherfucker.

Jimmy: Wow, do you kiss your mother with that mouth?

Timmy: *starts crying*

Jimmy: Ah fuck, I did it again.

What did the emo say to the popular kid?

"Go fuck yourself for thinking all emos cut because they don't... y'know, for a matter of fact, fuck all you guys..."

What makes piracy and anti-piracy so unique?

One isn't that of a thief, while the other is as serious as fuck.

Why do orphans like fucking other dads?

Because they get to have a daddy.

Why did my [redacted] a girl because she said, "Uh."

I'll kill a bitch like the policeman did to that white woman. He chopped her up and put her in the woods, the suck fuck.

What do blind kids and orphans have in common? I fucking hate their whiny asses and beat them up.

You know that the F in orphan may stand for family, but it actually stands for "fuck family."

A husband and wife get into a fight. The wife says, "Go blow off some steam. I’ll let you fuck a hooker." So he does that, comes back, and says, "I’m off the hook now!"

Why did I beat up the orphan? Because he was a whiny bitch who wouldn't shut the fuck up.

How do you f**k a duck?

Usually duck a f**k.