Friend

Friend jokes

Dad

Me and my friend roasting each other.

Him: Your dad dropped you on purpose, but my dad dropped me by accident.

Me: But after dropping you, he never picked you up.

Autobiography

My friend said that his book was getting boring and that he's gonna kill off some characters.

I asked him what his book was about and he said, "Oh, it's an autobiography."

Soulmate

I just did a test to see who my soulmate is, and it said "best friend." So I guess I am gay. I think so, WTF.

Help

Hi my sweet friends! This is for everyone who needs help right now :)

Memes

Friend memes

Love

To Tina: Hi, love, you're my oldest and dearest friend. I will love you for as long as I live. I luvv you so much, my sweetest, dearest darling.

Apology

Admins, if you are seeing this, please look in the comments of https://worstjokesever.com/jokes/5d521e61d3e53a06d27bc361/why-are-you-censoring-my-friend-franz.

I'm sorry.

Song

I would like to tell you the name of a song I showed to my friend who had an overdose of LSD.

I see a dreamer.

Sister

Friend A: "Why are you still a virgin, bro?"

Friend B: "I was until last night."

Friend A: "Nah, nah, who with?"

Friend B: "Your sister."

Friend A: "I don't have a sister."

Friend B: "Just wait 9 months, you'll see."

Bowl

My friend nearly drowned in her bowl of muesli the other day. She was pulled in by a strong "currant."

Dance

My friend is so short, whenever I dance with her, it’s like dancing with a golf tee.

Turtle

What’s the hardest part about being friends with a turtle?

Getting them to come out of their shell.

Bathroom

"Don't sneeze!"

Every time I was in the bathroom with my friends, I would always tell them, "Don't sneeze!" and when I did, they just laughed so hard. And when we sneezed, we laughed even harder.

Also,

"It dangles and swung!"

Language art quizzes are the best.

Carrot

Why couldn't the carrot go to his friend's house?

Because he was grounded.