Spread

Spread Jokes

Blonde

What is the difference between butter and a blonde? - Butter is difficult to spread.

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  • Baby

    Babies can spread a nasty smell,

    especially when you haven't fed them for a month.

  • 3
  • Depression

    when someone says to cheer up: you, I never thought of that. :)

    -> in reality, :( (sob)

    depression is no game, and here in this world, we are here for each other, although at times it might not seem like it.

    Keep strong, and you'll find the end of the tunnel, but ending the pain and being gone just spreads depression.

    HIV

    Me: spreading positivity.

    Everyone else at the HIV testing center.

    Covid

    Dad: Son, everyone in your class got COVID.

    Son (in a happy tone): I know.

    Dad: How do you know and why are you so glad?

    Son: Well, yesterday you told me to spread positivity.

    Butter

    Do you wanna hear the gossip about butter?

    Actually, I shouldn't spread it.

    Butter

    Did you hear the joke about the butter?

    What is it?

    I can’t tell you, you’ll spread it.

    Butter

    I heard a pretty juicy rumor about butter, but I decided I didn't want to spread it.

  • 0
  • Teeth

    Your teeth are so spread out my mom can drive her car through the gap in your teeth.

    Dentist

    A lady walks into a dentist's office, sits on the counter, and spreads her legs. The dentist says, "I think you have the wrong idea." The lady replies, "Last week you gave my husband his false teeth; now you can get them out."

    Covid

    When Covid spreads through food, but you realized you live in Africa.

    Peanut Butter

    One time I was at home alone with my dawgy, and I was eating peanut butter. I thought since it's oily, I could use it as a lotion, so I spread it all over my private part. My dawgy came over and started licking the peanut butter off my private part, and my private part got big and hard. Then, white stuff came out of my wee wee, and my dawgy started looking up at me and whining.

    And then my daddy came home and saw what I was doing and shouted, "What are you doing?" And I said I was using peanut butter on my private part. Then he said, "Well, let me have a taste." And then he started doing what my dawgy was doing.