Food jokes
A chicken walks into a bar.
He orders Dr. Pepper.
He then lays a good scrambled egg.
What dessert do you get on September 11th?
An ice cream flight!
I breathe in African food.
Fuck burger.
Your daddy's so fat, he tripped over a rock. He thought it was a chip.
What is the cheapest kind of meat?
Deer balls, two for under a buck!
What is an orphan and an apple?
They get picked.
What type of pizza did the 9/11 victims order? Two planes.
All these wraps and you still can't beatbox.
Why do orphans love chips?
Because they're all family sized.
Why do orphans love chips? They love the family-sized ones, too!
Why is it a bad idea to eat a clock? Because it's so time-consuming.
The emo kid ran away after his parents asked why they took the barcode sticker off the Oreos.
What do you get if you cross an avocado and a Glock?
Glockamole.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
Are you an egg? 'Cause your jokes ain't funny.
Catholic men say eating broccoli is like anal sex.
If you’re forced to have it as a child, you probably won’t like it as an adult.
"Hey Modda, I'm hungry."
Four cows went to the county fair. They saw a sign that said that next year animals can enter a singing contest. They decided that they would enter next year. So they called their group the "4 Cs Quartet" since their names were Clementine, Candy, Cookie, and Columbine.
They discovered how they could win. After a discussion, they decided to eat as much corn as possible, so they would sing in perfect 4 part hominy.
Why does the pancake team in baseball always win? Because they have the best batter.