Food jokes
Why do the Greeks and Romans like food? Because food is good for you.
What do you call it when Panera Bread decapitates someone?
Panera Behead.
If hay is for horses, what is for unicorns?
Haaaaaaay!
What do you call a chicken that was cared for? A tendered chicken.
What did the tomato say to the sad pickle?
"What's the big dill?"
Wanna hear a joke? You need some milk.
What did the sushi say to the bee?
"Wasuuubi!"
Why is it annoying to eat by basketball players? Because they dribble all the time!
What's the difference between an apple and a dead baby?
I don't jizz on an apple before eating it.
What's a lesbian's favorite candy?
Licorice.
What do you call someone who takes care of chickens?
A chicken tender.
What do you eat out of?
- A bowl.
Why do Vampires like virgins?
Because eating a sandwich would be so much more appealing knowing no one fucked it.
Why did the Nurse bring a red pen to work? To draw Blood.
Why did the M&M go to school? To be a smartie.
Why did the monkey bring a ladder to school? To be in highschool.
What do you call a drivable Hamburger?
What?
A Hamborgini.
You look like a sandwich Bigfoot didn't even like.
They say that breakfast is the most important meal of the day, well not if it's poisoned.
Then the antidote becomes the most important.
I like peanut butter and honey.
Why did the cheese fail the test? It couldn't make the grade, curd.
What did the baker say when he forgot the cookie sheets?
Ooh, snickerdoodles!