Food jokes
What did the steak say to the other steak?
How do you quiet a baby down?
Make baby back ribs for dinner.
Yo momma so stupid that she thought Dunkin' Donuts was a basketball team.
Want to know how you make any salad into a caesar salad? Stab it twenty-three times.
My wife made electric eel for supper. I was shocked!
When my friend eats a mint, I say, "Hey, is it mint to be sweet?"
Why are women like KFC?
After you've finished with the thigh and breasts, all you have left is a greasy box to put your bone in.
At what speed is the curry going at?
In a hurry to the curry, man!
What's Penaldo's least favorite food?
Indian Murukku, because it reminds him of Morocco! 🤣🤣🤣
Why didn’t the pecan go to the ballet?
It was afraid of the nutcracker.
A hamburger walks into a bar.
The bartender says, "I'm sorry. We don't serve food here."
Yo' mama's cooking is so bad, your family prays after they eat.
Why did the blondie put her iPad in the blender? To make apple juice.
What's a depressed person's least favorite type of cereal?
LIFE.
What do strippers and peanut butter have in common?
They both like oil.
Why do crabs never give to charity?
Because they're all shellfish.
So, I went out to eat the other day, and the waitress came up to me and asked if I wanted a glass of water. I said, "Yes ma'am." She said, "Oh honey, you don't have to call me ma'am, I'm not that old." I said, "Okay, thanks bitch."
Why doesn't Elon Musk like Taco Bell?
It gives him gas.
Why does Kermit like Miss Piggy covered in honey? Because he likes sweet and sour pork.
A young cowboy entered a seedy cafe in a small West Texas town.
He sat at the counter and spotted an elderly cowboy with his arms folded and his gaze fixed on a bowl of chili. After roughly 15 minutes of staring at it, the young cowboy boldly inquired, “If you’re not going to eat it, do you mind if I do?” Slowly turning his head toward the young wrangler, the older cowboy muttered, in his best cowboy voice, “Nah. Go ahead.”
The young cowboy eagerly reached over and slid the bowl over to his spot, spooning it in with glee. He was almost to the bottom when he noticed a rotten dead rat in the chili.
The sight was shocking, and he immediately upchucked the chili into the bowl. The old cowboy quietly said, “Yep, that’s as far as I got, too...”