Food jokes
What do you call expired milk?
The Milky Way.
A chicken is delicious.
Why do you let your dads sleep so they don't get grumpy and eat your dinner?
What did the frog order?
A diet Croak!
What does a nosy pepper do? Gets JALAPEÑO BUSINESS!
What do you call a nervous zucchini?
An edgy veggie.
My doctor said I could have up to 20 units a week. But now I've eaten half of my kitchen.
Give a man a potato, he is full for a day.
Give a man a poisoned potato, he'll be full for the rest of his life.
Pineapple turnover.
An Autistic chef made hamburgers out of donkey meat.
He called them: “ASPERGER’S”
Life is like a box of chocolates. It gets finished pretty quickly if you're a fat guy.
What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pork chop.
What snack do aliens like?
Mars Bars.
Where do smart hotdogs end up?
On the honor roll!
Julie: What's the difference between a chimp and a pizza?
John: I don't know.
Julie: Remind me not to send you to the store...
What do you get if you cross an apple with a shellfish?
A crab apple!
I don’t call it special ED, I call it mixed vegetables.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef! (aka dinner)
I like ramen. If you do, like!
Did you hear about the fish and chips? The fish got battered, the chips got salted.