Food jokes
When I was a kid, my father would tell me that the black Santa Claus was coming to our house for Christmas. So, instead of putting out cookies and milk, we would put out cornbread and purple Kool-Aid.
What do you call a guy who loves to eat out a hoe's pussy?
Answer: a Carnivwhore.
What do you call a gay guy eating Cheerios?
Fruit Loops.
What’s the difference between jelly and jam?
You can’t “jelly” it in her ass.
Did Walmart take the Juneteenth ice cream off the shelf?
It was only 3/5 full.
Memes
I saw my sisters masturbating with cucumbers and hotdogs.
I said, "Come on, I was gonna eat that later! Now it's just gonna taste like hotdogs and cucumbers!"
Did you know that the first French fries weren’t cooked in France? They were cooked in Greece.
My wife asked me the other day where I got so much candy. I said, "I always have a few Twix up my sleeve."
I ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon....I'll let you know.
"I got that dawg in me," said the Asian men after lunch.
McDonald's worker be like, "Hello, would you like a Mc-Dick?" (You looked down) You: "Uhh, where's my dick?"
What do you call it when Panera Bread goes to space?
Good question.
What do you call it when Panera Bread decapitates someone?
Panera Behead.
Why did the rapper become a chef?
Because he knew how to cook up FRESH BEETS!
Why did the rapper go to the seafood restaurant?
Because he heard they had PHAT BASS.
I just encountered a father and son moment over some milk.
The dad finally came back with the milk!
Why did the rapper open a bakery?
To drop some SWEET BEATS!
What's a rapper's favorite type of food?
Wrap sandwiches.
Why did the rapper get kicked out of the grocery store?
He kept dropping the BEETS!
What do you call a gender neutral person who is lactose intolerant non-bi dairy?