Food jokes
Kermit the Frog and Fozzie Bear were having a picnic.
Fozzie said, "Do you know where Ms. Piggy is? I haven't seen her all day."
Kermit said, "I don't know, but this extra bacon cheeseburger sure tastes great."
Your mom gave me a three course meal last night:
Starters - Foreplay
Main course - Reverse Cowgirl
Dessert - Blowy
Won't forget the side drink of an individual on individual bukkake.
Q. What do you call a biracial kid in a vegetative state?
A. A mixed vegetable.
Q. What do you call a rich person who is in a vegetative state?
A. A loaded potato.
Why do French people eat snails?
Because they don’t like fast food.
Women have eggs and milk in them...
And they say that they don't belong in the kitchen.
What's the difference between a baby and a cooked chicken?
Several hundred calories.
I was watching TV with my brother, and a diabetes commercial came on saying, "I have type one diabetes, and I manage it well."
My brother said, "You want a cookie?"
I was watching TV with my brother, and a diabetes commercial came on saying, "I have type one diabetes, and I manage it well." My brother said, "You want a sugar cookie?"
Why do Black people dip their Oreos in water?
Because daddy never came back home with the milk.
NSFW Why can't women ever tell men where the clitoris is?
'Cause it's a place to eat.
What's the difference between milk and my dad?
Nothing, I apparently am allergic to both because I never see either of them.
Remember, children, when you're hungry at 3:00, cook forks for 10 minutes, ok?
Why can't fat kids change a tire?
They would eat the donut.
Q: What's the difference between Terri Schiavo and a tomato?
A: A tomato isn't a vegetable.
Q: Why didn't Jeffery Dahmer eat comedians?
A: He thought they tasted funny.
"Pull down your pants, pull out my willy, stir your guts round like a hot bowl of chili."
Why would a vegetarian never moan during sex?
They don't wanna admit that a piece of meat made them happy.
Yo mama's so fat, she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl!
Why'd Billy get fired from the banana factory?
He kept throwing with the bent one.