Food jokes
I’ve been munching away on these new Tic Tacs recently and honestly, they are really good.
It’s a little strange how they came in a bottle labeled “Ibuprofen” though, and really, I’m starting to feel a little sick. The bottle’s almost empty though, so it’s time to get some more!
Did you hear about the woman who put her husband’s ashes in a burrito?
He gets to tear that ass up one more time.
Why do vegans use blowjobs?
Because they can’t take real meat.
What did Mrs. Hotdog join after Mr. Hotdog joined LGBBQ+? The LGBBQ++ premium.
What's the difference between a gay man and a freezer?
A freezer doesn't scream when you put meat inside it.
What's the LGBTQ+'s favorite cereal?
Fruity Pebbles.
Why do vegans like to make their food look and taste like meat?
Same reason lesbians use strap-ons. They still like putting meat in their hole, but they don’t like where real meat comes from.
What’s another term for a lesbian?
A vagetarian.
How do rappers like their pizza?
With extra bars and dough!
What the can say to the tomato?
Tomato tomato potato potato find twelve recipe for the both 👍🏾
I put on ingredient sticker read for tasting good.
Kid: What is an orphan's favorite breakfast?
Teacher: What?
Kid: Fruity Pebbles with water.
Teacher: Why water?
Kid: 'Cause his dad never came back with the milk.
Why I can’t be skinny? I hurt myself for fatting. - Jenny
Hello please I want gain wait. - Jenny year later.
How many potatoes to feed the elephant?
My dog is named Max, and he likes to eat dog food. Therefore, everyone named Max likes to eat dog food.
A fat homeless person begged me for food, so I said, "I can see your dinner. You had plenty!"
What's a prostitute's favorite snack?
Skittles. They love to taste the rainbow.
What does a gynecologist and delivery driver have in common?
Whenever they’re hungry, they can just scrape a little cheese off the top of the box.
Why is it a bad idea to eat a clock? Because it's so time-consuming.
I ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon....I'll let you know.
Did you know that the first French fries weren’t cooked in France? They were cooked in Greece.