(Phone call) This is Franks funeral home and grill where yesterday’s grief is todays beef. How may we help you ?
The orphan wanted to call home sick but there was no one
the orphan went to school to have food but there was no money in his account
They say the surest way to a man’s heart is through the stomach. But, I find going through the ribcage a lot easier.
Chef: “How did you enjoy your steak, sir?” Customer: “I asked for it medium rare, but it’s well done!” Chef: “Why thank you.” Customer: “You don’t understand, the steak is well done!” Chef: “Of course it is, I made it.”
Why are emo jokes so infamous?
They cut deep.
Why isn’t the Moon Emo anymore?
Turns out it was just a phase.
How many emos like anagrams?
Some.
What do you call those who remain My Chemical Romance fans?
Emold.
What is the connection between Emos and Darth Vader?
They both dress in all black and none of them has a father.
What do you call flat-chested emo?
A cutting board.
How many emo kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Who cares, let them cry in the dark.
Why did the emo kid leave the food on the table?
It was the Happy Meal.
Anthony went into the bakery and ordered Emo Cake.
“Emo cake?” says the baker. ” What exactly is it?”
Anthony says, “It’s the cake that cuts itself.”
How do you pull an emo from a tree?
Cut the rope.
What’s the similarity between emos and unsalted popcorn?
They’re both white and flavourless.
What do emo birds call their mouths?
Bleaks.
What do you call an obese emo teen?
An edgelard.
Recommended: Fat Jokes
What do you call a gang of emo kids?
Suicide Squad.
How are cats and emos different from one another?
The cat still has 8 other lives.
Why does emo get tattoos of fruits on their arms?
They are playing Fruit Ninja.
What will you call Sonic if he’s an emo?
Sonic the Edgy hog.
Why would the emo swallow a clock?
So he could wake up inside.
Why are Emos still around?
Because the suffering never ends.
What is the best way to get an emo off your balcony?
You encourage them.
What kind of bath bomb does an Emo prefer?
A toaster.
What is the favourite game of an emo?
Hangman.
Why do people wish their lawn grass was emo?
So it could cut itself.
A group of friends started an emo salsa band.
They call themselves HisPanic at the Disco.
What is the difference between pizza and emo pizza?
Emo pizza kind of cuts itself.
What's the difference between McDonald's and a priest?
nothing... they both stick their meat in ten-year-old buns.
What do orphans and olden day actors have in common? Both get food thrown at them some of the time.
one time michael jackson had an elergic reaction from eation 12 year old nuts
Did you hear they made an Emo-Hipster pizza? It cuts itself, and you're supposed to eat it before its cool.
I-I-I-I-I-I keep on hopin' we'll eat cake by the ocean (uh)
Well yo mama is fat. And when she loses weight all the food that she has is hers but the Africans get none
what does the teachers eat they eat square stuff
Man: How do you prepare your chicken? Waiter: Nothing special, we just tell them they’re going to die.
Fatty told Skinny, "Do you have any food? My stomach is empty and I haven't eaten."
Skinny replied to Fatty, "Well, doesn't seem like you need food, you ate the whole universe instead!"
My girlfriend said onions were the only foods that make you cry. -
Until I threw a watermelon in her face
~Robin
why did the rape victim stop eating pears?
because she was told that if you rearrange the letters PEAR it spells "rape"
What's the difference between a child and a carrot? About 140 calories.
A vampire goes to the bakery.
Vampire: "One bun, please."
Baker: "But you're a vampire, don't you need blood?"
Vampire: "Yes, there is an accident outside and I need something to dip."
Whats an asian's favorite food place. Answer:Petco
This is the real reason why the chicken crossed the road.
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: To visit his grandmother at KFC.
