You got no lotion to masturbate, then you remember there's some leftover porridge in the fridge. 😌🤎😇
I tried to make a pun about cheese, but I couldn't think of any good "whey" to do it.
Why was the cheese always so confident? Because it had such a "gouda" self-image.
Why did the cheese blush? Because it saw the salad dressing.
What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain.
What do you call a pile of cheese? A cheese grater.
Why did the cheese fail the test? It couldn't make the grade, curd.
Why did the cheese go to therapy? Because it had too many emotional holes.
My friend says, "You should try Oreos with water."
Me: No, because my dad actually came back with the milf.
Pop a choccy milk!
What did the bread photographer say to the toast? Say, "Toasted cheese!"
Why are the Chinese bad at baseball?
Because they ate all the bats.
I read the joke "what we breathe is called oxygen, that is African food" to my African friend, but he is breathing in tears from his mother dying of hunger...
The old cookoo master on the top of Mt. Qinshan told me this when I was eating sushi:
"The first bite tastes like heaven, the second takes you there."
😳
One time, I was making a caramel apple.
When I mistook 1 gallon of caramel for 1 camel!
Some guy: making a sandwich.
Me: *rages* to put the ham in!
Why do Mexicans eat tacos?
Because they're border hoppers.
Why did the rooster go to the train station to get the pizza?
I thought a waitress said to me, "You're good looking." In fact, she was asking if I'd like some pudding.
"Watch out, plane! Wait, really? I ordered pepperoni."
People should've recognized that Jared Fogle was a sick offender by one coded Subway sandwich; he normally claimed to kids he ate the sweet onion chicken teriyaki when it was the tuna sub.
Tuna sub was the message of the target to the kid since "tuna sub" put together makes "tunasub" and the truth comes when you spell it in reverse ("busanut")!
