Riddle me this, Batman, what's long, round, and has cum in the middle?
Batman: A dick.
Riddler: NO NO NOOO! It's a cucumber!
Food Jokes
What's the difference between jelly and jam? You can't jelly a clown into the tiny car.
Want to know how you make any salad into a Caesar salad?
Stab it twenty-three times.
New business idea: let's put a KFC in Africa and a watermelon shop.
What’s the difference between a baby and a baked potato?
About 140 calories.
What’s the difference between a fetus and a jar of pickles?
The pickles aren’t as tasty in a jar.
What does an 80-year-old woman taste like?
Depends.
"What did the mama tomato say to the baby tomato? Catch up!"
Why did the baby strawberry cry? Because his mom was in a jam!
Why did the cookie cry?
Because its mom was a wafer too long!
There's nothing quite like being told I'm wrong by someone who depends on me for food, clothing, and shelter.
Guys, you need to ketchup with the time.
Inflation is so bad, McDonald’s is selling the 1/4 ouncer.
How do you disappoint people in Africa?
Send a message saying that you’re going to send trucks full of food, water, and clothing.
But don’t follow through and send the trucks empty.
How do you cook an alligator? With a croc-pot.
How do mice floss their teeth? With string cheese.
Have you ever had a bad sausage? It's the wurst.
How can you tell if a pig is hot? It's bacon.
What does cake and baseball have in common?
They both need a batter.
What do you call a pig who knows how to use a knife? A pork chop.
