Event jokes
I was in a bar in Italy. Me and a hot chick got along, so I asked her for her number. I remembered that there was a pen in my pocket, but when I searched, it was nowhere to be found. I turned back, then I saw Pessi running with it. Shame on you, Pessi, for ruining my night! 😭
One weekend some distant family members that I hadn't met before came over. My cousins (who I also hadn't met before) were fighting, so I decided to separate them and place them in opposite corners of the room (thinking it would help).
My mom took me to an empty room with tears in her eyes and told me they both ended up dying.
Well, SO-RRY, but I didn't know they were conjoined twins.
My last best man's speech was like the marriage--short, occasionally funny, and ultimately ruined by the bridesmaid.
What do gingers miss most at a grate party?
The invitation.
A father came to his daughter's 18th birthday. He finally came.
Why are school shootings branded “very American”?
1. They usually happen in the USA.
2. They’re like the Fourth of July: there’s a lot of loud banging and kids screaming.
2001/9/11, that day was fire.
Why can’t orphans go to daughter and dad dance night? They don’t have a dad to go with.
Guys, stop joking about 9/11. It's just plane wrong.
Why was the peanut butter upset at his retirement party?
He was roasted.
Two people just met. One said, “We should do some bonding.” The other nodded and said back, “Titanic.” The first just looked confused so the second one just said, “Sorry, thought that would be a good icebreaker.”
Twin Tower jokes are funny because they are dead.
Fat women can't walk, but on 9/11, they ran.
Why does 9/11 only get a day, but Pride gets an entire month?
Because pride is a bigger tragedy.
What do you call a house party for slaves?
An auction house.
Just saw the news that Kobe passed. I guess there's a first for everything.
(everyone on Titanic) Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh, the ship will sink!!!!
(person washing hands) I'm using the sink, wait your turn!!!!!
(all crew members laugh) Hahahhahahahahah.
Not sure if the Twin Towers were destroyed or if they were just purposely demolished. 🖐️😀
I watched the series of "Unfortunate Events" 4 times, all the shows 4 times. I am crying. I am trying to finish the rest, then my brother comes in and says it is PG (Parental Guidance). After that, my brother called me a baby, then he pushed me off my bed. 😭
Your breath is so hot, it made the Chicago fire!