End jokes
What starts with S and ends with S? STUPID HOMEWORK NEVER ENDS.
What starts with C and ends with K? Children do not cook.
What did you think I was going to say? How bold of you to assume.
I think it was wrong for that school shooter to end his life at the scene.
He could have done some good by becoming some lonely lifer's bottom.
Once upon a time, the end was what? When? How? End meow.
What is the difference between an orphan and a mailman?
The mailman goes home at the end of the day.
One day, there was an ugly barnacle. It was so ugly that everyone died. The end!
Twinkle, twinkle, there’s a car Coming like a shooting star.
I will stand in the way. I will not be seen again. Are you happy I am dead? Now you made it to the end.
Went swimming today and peed in the deep end. The lifeguard saw me and blew his whistle so loud I almost fell in.
If I have ligma and you have ligma, how about you ligma balls? 😏 (It’s all about how you pronounce the end.)
Roads be so rough in Oklahoma, I saw a high lifted truck get ended riding lower than a Hot Wheels car.
What starts with F and ends with uck? Firetruck, what were you thinking?
You're at a buffet, you think you're hungry for two, but misfortune happens when you think of yourself. You get stuck looking at sides in the buffet. A roly poly gal you see in the corner of your eye, eyeballing the main dishes in front at the end. You go in for the pickings, you get intercepted by a far more hungrier matter, but you find yourself getting slammed over the buffet table, and realize you are gasping for air, and she is tenderizing you for dinner.
Motherhood is a fairytale in reverse. You start in a beautiful gown and end up cleaning everyone's messes.
What is a joke that will never end even though you want it to?
For me, life.
Your forehead is like a line, it just keeps going.
I keep hearing "Obesity kills."
My only question is "Why is it taking so long?"
Hey everyone, I'm back because I'm sinking back towards depression because my sister is really being a bitch, and my parents always side with her, and the stress over online school is just getting overwhelming, and I'm seriously considering hanging myself to end it all because the pain is just... terrible, and I feel like I'm not worth life.
I’m going back to the house to get some stuff for my dad, and then I’m going to have a car and a birthday party come up for the weekend at the end of the week. I was going to get my birthday cake for the day.
One day at school, little Johnny was not listening, so the teacher came up to him.
Teacher: "At the end of this ruler is someone dumb."
Little Johnny: "Miss, which end were you referring to?"
I fucked a chick named Macy, but she had dyslexia. So I ended up doing the YMCA.
Nessie is dying.