Dog

Dog jokes

Rapper

Why did the rapper go to the pet store?

To buy a dog for his bark tracks!

Orphan

Why are dogs different than orphans?

Because dogs don't cry for their parents.

Memes

Shit

Q: What do you call a dog that stepped in its own shit?

A: I don't know.

Teacher

Do you know the teacher that went up into space?

You know what her husband said to her? "I will feed the dog; you feed the fish."

Poo

My mum told me to do the dog poo, but I couldn't find you anywhere.

Anime

I’m part of the anti anime association, but I’m starting to like anime. What do I do?

And for the joke: What do you call a dog with no back legs and a pair of metal balls? Sparky.

Friend

I can never get away from my dog, he follows me everywhere. I think you two would be really good friends.

Cow

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

What do you call a dog with no legs? No point in calling, he won't come anyway :(

Insult

My crush's best friend came up to me and called me my crush's dog šŸ•, so then I say, "Wow, you're an ass for calling me a bitch." He then looks at me wide-eyed, and I just walk away.

Trumpet

I taught my dog how to play the trumpet on the London Underground over the weekend.

He went from Barking to Tooting in just under 20 minutes.