Mom: There is so much of the dog's dirty ball marks.
Me: *umm ohh no* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA dirty balls!
Dog Jokes
What's the difference between a man's wife and his dog?
Lock them both in the trunk for three hours and see which is happy to see you when you open it.
Why did the rapper go to the pet store?
To buy a dog for his bark tracks!
What animal has 5 legs?
A pitbull on a children's playground.
What comment did the United States Senator Kamla Harris make when one of her 64% blue dog democrat constituents called her incompetent?
"Sometimes I sits and thinks, and sometimes I just sits!"
My mom told me that my friend Paul is coming over, and he is going to sleep over, so I was happy.
The next day, I ask my mom, "Where's the dog?" My mom asks me, "What dog?"
Then I said to my mom, "I heard Paul say, 'Do you want it doggy?' and you said 'Yeah.'"
Note to all moms of teens, keep a dog. That way, someone is excited to see you!
What do dogs and planks have in common? They both have to be walked.
What do you call a dog that fell into the Porta-Potty?
A Corgi Potty.
Q: What breed of dog is supposed to laugh at all of your jokes?
A: A Chihuahua.
What do dogs drink? Pupsi.
What did the female dog say to the mirror?
Hi, bitch!
I smell up dog in here.
"What's up, dog?"
Nothing much, how about you?
What do you call a dog that is part pug, part poodle, and part cup?
A muggle! 🤠🤠🤠🤠🥴
Why do dogs like skeletons?
Because they're boneheads.
Yo mama so ugly, she has a sign in her garden saying, “Beware of the dog!”
Why are dogs different than orphans?
Because dogs don't cry for their parents.
What do you call a dog magician?
A labracadabrador.
What did the dog say to the cat? Ruff!
Q: What do you call a dog that stepped in its own shit?
A: I don't know.
