Dog jokes
Why is Sonic so fat? He eats too many chili dogs.
I had sex with my dog once, and my cat hissed at me for not doing her.
Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow?
Her dog was blind, too.
My dad walked in on me having sex with a dog. She gasped and shouted at me, "Get out of here, it's my turn!"
Which dog is owned by a kid called "Charlie Brown," raps, and smokes?
Snoopy Dog.
1. You can't wash your eyes with soap.
2. You can't count your hair.
3. You can't breathe through your nose with your tongue out.
4. You just tried number three.
5. When you tried number 3, you realized it was possible, only you look like a dog.
6. You're smiling right now because you realized you were fooled.
7. You skipped number 5.
8. You just checked if there was a number 5.
9. This is not my joke; all credit goes to Steps.
Like if you like dogs. Dislike if you like cats. Other animal? Tell me in the comments!
Why did the dog cross the road twice?
Because he was trying to catch a boomerang.
What's the difference between an orphan and a dog?
One of them is actually loved.
The other day my girlfriend asked me to hand her the red lipstick, so I handed her the dog.
What do you call a bitch?
You call it a female dog.
Why does Donald Trump smell like dog shit? Cuz he's a dawg!
My girlfriend is incredibly sad since her cat has disappeared.
I am quite sure now that I misunderstood something when she asked me to eat her pussy--and I am beginning to think that I did not get the "fuck her doggy" part either.
Why do orphans love dogs?
Because dogs stay with them.
What is a doll's favorite dog? A doll-matian.
I pushed a dog into a fire and said, "Hot dog!"
What was the comment that Vice President Harris said in the United States Senate when a blue dog democrat in the United States Senate called Vice President Harris a bitch?
Kibbles 'N Bits!! Kibbles 'N Bits!! I is going to get me some Kibbles 'N Bits!!
I should name my dog Ariana Grande.
That way I could say that I fucked Ariana Grande.
Why did the dog go into the fire?
Because it wanted to be a hot dog!
Why can’t an orphan have a dog? It always runs away.