Dog jokes
As a kid, I was made to walk the plank.
Because we couldn't afford a dog.
Are you dead? Because you look like my dog.
Watch this dog https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gM8gBVjVTaQ
Why did the dog cross the road?
It didn't. Got hit by a car on the way to the other side.
What did the dog say to the other dog?
Susie: Ling Ling, truth or dare?
Ling Ling: Truth.
Susie: What happened to Stacie's dog?
Ling Ling: Dare.
How do you turn your dog into a watchdog?
Get it a Rolex!
Is your middle name Fancy Feast?
'Cause your face looks like a can of dog food.
If a dog is white with black spots, then it is 90% great and 10% guilty because it half way starts crimes and is a mistake to the world and is punished by the white dogs that are full white and not mixed colors.
Are people still mad at Hasan from that dog incident? All he wanted to do was become the world’s first lightningbender.
I say we shouldn’t do any jokes about dogs cause dogs are the best, but cats suck.
Q. What's a dog's favourite type of sex? A. Ruff.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Ruff ruff.
Ruff ruff who?
Let the dogs out.
How do you make a cat sound like a dog? Pour gasoline on it, then light it on fire and it will go "WOOF!"
How do you make a dog sound like a cat? Put it in the deep freeze until frozen solid, then run it through an electric saw and it will go "MMMRROWWWWWW!"
Confusion life question!!!
* Can you cry underwater? * Do fishes ever get thirsty? * Why don't birds fall out the tree when they sleep? * Why is a building called that when it's already built? * When they say dog food is new and improved, who tastes it?
Why are dogs different than orphans?
Because dogs don't cry for their parents.
I am so disappointed in this race.
Brown skinned street shitters, goddamn, the lowest of the low southeast Asians, lazy monkey pig-dog duck fetus eating rice brainlets always on their phones, no IQ, ugly, uncivilized untermensch subhumans.
What is a dog's favorite snack?
RUFFles.
What do you call a dog magician?
A labracadabrador.
What do you call a smart blonde Labrador?