Doesnt jokes

What's the difference between cancer and a Nazi? Cancer doesn't discriminate.

I made a website for orphans.

Unfortunately, it doesn’t have a home page.

If at first it doesn't succeed, try, try again.

What's the difference between a child and a book?

One doesn't scream when you snap its neck.

So, one day I walk up to my sister and tell her that she is adopted because she doesn't look like anyone in the family. She starts to cry. My mom asks why she's crying, and I say I told her she was adopted and I was there for the adoption, and we have papers. It was all a lie. She is not adopted, and everything is fine.

Why can't an orphan play baseball?

He doesn't have a home to go to.

I asked my now ex-boyfriend why he’s scared of my cat. He said it was because of the scratches on my arm.

I told him that my cat doesn’t scratch, but he didn’t believe me. He realised what I meant when he noticed I kept hiding my wrist from everyone else.

(Kinda based on the fact that my ex is indeed scared of cats, and he has been scared of my cat, so yeah 😂)

What do you call a moose that doesn't want to be known? Anonymoose.

"Just because I don't like Lewis Hamilton, doesn't make me racist."

When Trump goes to the beach, he doesn't use suntan lotion. He uses Dorito dust, and it stays on for the rest of his life.

Why doesn’t Pakistan have any football teams?

Every corner they get, they open a shop on it!

Marriage is like buying a car. You see one that you like and then you buy it. But over the years, it gets older, rusty, and certain parts stop working.

Then you walk into a dealership and look at all the new ones and you're still stuck with the old one. You look over and go, "But I just wanna sit in it. Just once. It's even got leather interior, it's chrome, it doesn't even have oil or gas leaks! And it doesn't squeak!"

what's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? the trampoline doesn't cave in when i jump on it.

What goes up but doesn't come down?

Who works at IHOP? A girl with one leg.

P1: Why did the chicken cross the road?

P2: To get to the other side DUH?!?

P1: No dumbass, it's to get run over because he has depression, a chronic illness, and his father left him for a good for nothing pimp that doesn’t even give a shit about how he feels. (Kinda like me).

P2: Holy shit are u ok? *Some random eavesdropping fucker dials 911 in a hurry*

Little Johnny walked to his parents' room. They were having sex, and Little Johnny didn’t know what that was, so he said, "What are y’all doing?"

The parents replied, "Umm, r-rapping presents!"

Little Johnny said, "Okay," and then left. In the morning, Little Johnny opened his presents. His parents said, "This one is from Santa!"

Little Johnny said, "No, it’s not, y’all said y’all were rapping the presents."

The parents said, "Ohh fuck!"

Little Johnny replied, "What, Mommy and Daddy?" They replied, "Oh, nothing!" "Oh, okay," Little Johnny said. The mom whispered in the dad's ear, "At least he doesn’t know the truth."

Little Johnny said, "What truth?"

What did the orphan say to his father?

Nothing, he doesn't have one.

What do you call a can opener that doesn't work?

A can't opener.

Life is like a box of chocolates. It doesn’t last as long for fat people.

It's not bad that my car doesn't beep when reversing.

The screams of the passers-by are enough for me!