Lack Jokes

In History class, the teacher taught a lesson about serial killer Albert Fish. Back in the early 20th century, Fish reportedly kidnapped, ate, and raped over 100 kids. He mainly chose victims who were either retarded or black. Further on the lesson, the teacher explained how in those days, black people were socially not equal with white people, and how people with mental illness were not accepted and treated properly due to a lack of knowledge of mental health.

One of the students raised their hand and said, “You ought to be arrested.” The teacher confusedly asked, “Why?” The student explained, “Because you’re thinking like Albert Fish.”

What type of cookie has an orphan never had? Homemade cookies.

I have no father or no milk. Like if you relate.

What does B.I.B.L.E. stand for?

Bull Shit In Book Lacking Evidence.

Does it cycle now?

With numerous reports of Donald Trump's odor and Kelly Clarkson's lack of hygienic habits... proof that money doesn't buy cleanliness.

What do the initials BIBLE stand for?

Bull In Book Lacking Evidence

What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a Mercedes?

I don’t have a Mercedes.

Why did the orphan commit a bank robbery?

So he could be wanted.

A note for my History Teacher:

Frick frack apple jack tic tac sick sack Mr. Khan and give him a big fat whack 'cause his teaching's got lack, his system I will hack and through the screen I'll give him a smack. I'll throw him on the clothing rack. On his seat I'll put thumb tacks, I'll break his momma's back... and he'll never come back.

There's nothing more depressing than a failed suicide attempt.

What caused the Great Depression? A lack of comedians.

"If we don’t have a strategy, then the enemy will never know our strategy."

-Sun Tzu, Art of War.

"Disease" technically means "lack of ease," so if a girl is hard to get, call her a disease.

That's what Elliot Rodger did.

Why can’t orphans win trophies?

Because they can’t take them home.

Why can't an orphan play baseball?

They don't know where home is.

What do you do when you're bored?

I beat up orphans.

What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?

Being a man that is poor really isn't that bad as long as you are involved in the world's oldest profession and you are well-endowed and you are not homophobic and as long as you can suck the chrome off a tailpipe then you have nothing to worry about if you are desperate enough to pay your bills.

Lack of money is the root of all evil. 😊

Why are orphans bad at baseball?

They don't have a home plate.

There are two types of faces:

The handsome one, but the wallet is ugly.

Then there is this personal face full of bumps, but even they lack a wallet.

What did the blind man say on Christmas?

"I can feel your presents!"

Yo what quacking lacking? Looking for a ducking good time? I've got some one lines and knee slappers that ought to fix the bill. What happens flied upside down? It quacks up.