Disease jokes
What's the best way to remove gum from hair?
Cancer.
What’s the worst thing about having a daughter with cancer?
You can’t pull on her hair when you’re raping her.
How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? 10, 1 to change the lightbulb, 9 to talk about how inspired they are?
Are you corona? Cuz it’s hard to breathe around you ;)
Dark humor is like cancer; it's funnier when kids get it.
How would you best describe prostate cancer?
Well, it is somewhere between a dick and an asshole!
What game hurts you the more stages you survive?
Cancer.
Pinocchio goes to the doctor for a checkup. When he gets there, the doctor asks him, "Do you have cancer?" Pinocchio replies, "That was very straight up, but no, I’m pretty sure I don’t have cancer." After saying this, his nose grew.
When Covid spreads through food, but you realized you live in Africa.
When you have a bladder infection,
You're in trouble. 😜
"What did the blind, dumb, paraplegic, dead, eight-year-old child get for their birthday?"
"Cancer."
Disney just released a new film about a poor kid with cancer. It’s called Finding Chemo.
I wish I didn't have depression because all my friends have "BBC Bitch be crazy" disease.
Ever heard of a rape victim with Alzheimer's?
Yeah, neither have they.
The new pandemic is feminism and all kinds of democratic thinking. COVID is a joke compared to these nasty ass diseases.
A pair of cows were talking in the field. One says, "Have you heard about the mad cow disease that's going around?"
"Yeah," the other cow says. "Makes me glad I'm a penguin."
Grandpa: "Sonny, let me tell you something. There's only one damn thing in this whole world worse than Alzheimer's."
Boy: "What's that?"
Grandpa: "What's what?"
Every zodiac sign has a different hairstyle except Cancer.
Everybody was kung flu dying.
It traveled as fast as lightning.
2020 was expert timing.
In fact, it was a little bit frightening.
I saw an advertisement for colored pens and how they write. They take a blue pen and write "blue," a yellow pen and write "yellow." I was inspired too.
I took a pen, filled it with my blood, and wrote "AIDS."