Three guys are escaping from North Korea through a tunnel.
The guards know that they are coming and will shoot them with paintball guns as a warning.
The guys show up and the guards shoot them.
The guys die because the guards used real guns.
My dad: You better wear flip-flops everywhere.
Suicidal son: Goes to crack alley.
A 6-year-old girl decides to get baptized. She walks into the water of the river. Unfortunately, the pastor was drunk. The pastor put her in the water and dunked her under. The drunken man then forgot to bring her up from the water. The poor girl drowned and died...
Later on, when the pastor was better and thrown in jail, all he had to say to the mortified family was, “Well, at least she’s in heaven!”
He went too far away from the wall, and he got unplugged.
He died because he rolled too far away from the wall outlet and got unplugged.
What's the difference between 13 dead babies and a skeleton?
There aren't any, there's 13 skeletons in my closet.
I lost $10,000, so I killed my piggy bank, so I get a real pig and money which my money is fake, but the janitor said it is real, so I killed myself and turned into a real human.
I can’t wait for collage....
5 min later, ight I’m gonna go kill myself.
POV: Orphans rule the world.
God said, "I'm your dad," then kills himself.
The orphan: Waaaaaa!
A noose, a knife, a gun, and a razor blade look at a child who committed suicide after being bullied.
Everyone looked at the noose. The noose would say, "What? It wasn't my fault!"
Remember the big forehead kid who said, "Give me a knife, I'm going to kill myself" because of being bullied?
His head was too big to even exist, and that's why he's dead.
When the school shooter runs out of ammo: K a l m.
When he grabs a full mag: P a n i k.
When he looks back and doesn't see you, but you're hiding in one of the classrooms: K a l m.
When the autistic kid's Sketchers light up: P A N I K.
How did they know that Princess Diana had dandruff?
They found her Head and Shoulders in the glove box.
How did Sally die?
She got shot.
Stephen Hawking didn't die, he got sucked up by the black hole then got sent to the large charger in the sky.
A man came up to a girl about to jump off a cliff. The man said, "Why?" She then replies, "There are many monsters in this world, and I am one of them."
1) Did you hear the one about the school shooting? Actually, I better not... You wouldn't understand, it's aimed more towards a younger audience.
2) 6 was scared cuz 7 8 9, so why was 10 scared? Because it was in between 9/11.
3) 10 dead babies.
At an orphan's funeral, you say, "Your dad came back."
Hang in there, ya emo bastards! Remember, you could always be dead. Oh, too soon?
No wonder they wanna die so much. I'd wanna die too if I was a freak who listens to Black Veil Brides!
Anybody got a knife? I mean, an emo dildo?
How Stephen Hawking died: he drove too far away from the wall and the cord got unplugged.
