Death jokes
Every woman will die in five seconds.
Mother: Dies.
Sister: Dies.
Girlfriend: Lives.
You: π€¬
So, I met Michael Jackson before he died. He dragged me to his bed.
What does a condom and a coffin have in common?
They both still have stiffs, but one is coming and one is going.
My father died in 9/11. It's such a shame. He was a great pilot. π
I love my grandpa, he killed Hitler.
What's the difference between an orphan and a dew?
One goes up and one goes down.
I canβt wait for collage....
5 min later, ight Iβm gonna go kill myself.
Covid said to stay 6 feet... I didn't think Kobe meant it literally.
Why did Diana cross the road? Because she wasn't wearing a seatbelt.
It hasn't been the same since Kobe died. I can't say "Kobe" anymore when going to shoot a shot. Now I have to say, "Kobe crash!"
My dad died in 9/11... He was the best pilot I know.
The ocean will kill you to death expensively if you're on Titanic. Buying the tickets was a waste of money.
Dark jokes are like a new day. Suicidal people don't get it.
It's Christmas morning, and all the decorations are done, but the tree looks like it's missing something. *grabs the noose*
When your cousin who has a lisp died from the impostor in Among Us,
"THE IMPASTA KILLED MEH!"
What's the best part about a dead prostitute?
The second hour is free.
Robin Williams' death was the most horrible impression ever given. (RIP Robin Williams, you will be missed!)
My girlfriend's dog died, so I got her a new one in replacement, and she went off on me and yelled,
"What am I supposed to do with 2 dead dogs in my house?!"
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He had no balls to do it.
What game do emo kids love the most? Hangman.