Death

Death jokes

It hasn't been the same since Kobe died. I can't say "Kobe" anymore when going to shoot a shot. Now I have to say, "Kobe crash!"

The ocean will kill you to death expensively if you're on Titanic. Buying the tickets was a waste of money.

It's Christmas morning, and all the decorations are done, but the tree looks like it's missing something. *grabs the noose*

Robin Williams' death was the most horrible impression ever given. (RIP Robin Williams, you will be missed!)

Want to hear an abortion joke, or any joke for that matter? You have that option, and you can thank your mother for that.

But that's a question that will never be heard by an aborted unborn baby, whose only option was death. And that's no joke.

I have a friend who doesn't have a dad.

He says: "You're useless, go to hell!"

Me: "Wait, why do you want me to join your dad?"

I walk in from work to find my wife dead on the sofa.

As I unzip for one last ride, she says, "BOO!" What kind of sick fuck does that?

I come in from work to see my wife dead on the sofa. As I unzip for one last ride, she says, "BOO!" What kind of a dick fuck does that!

I wish I was a policeman, 'cause then I would actually have a gun to shoot myself with.