Dating jokes
So, I went up to an Australian girl. She looked like she was 20, and I said, "Can I have your phone number, sweetheart?" She said, "696969." I said, "Oh, haha, okay." A few days later, her mother called me and said she's 15.
One day a woman met with a man behind an abandoned shop.
The man asked for some crack.
The woman turned around and said, "Here."
That's where the crack was, you guessed it.
The next day, she wiped it clean, ready for the next guest who "wanted crack."
Question: What is the BIG ADVANTAGE to going out on a date with a "Homeless Chic"?
Answer: After the date, you can "Drop Her Off" ANYWHERE!
Me: And this is the room I cry in.
Date: You've said that about every room.
Me: Correct!
I asked my phone why I couldn't get a date.
It showed a picture of myself.
Memes
On my Tinder profile, I said, "I prefer quality over quantity." I just thought it sounded nicer than saying "no fat birds."
When you have an ex, you will notice that the word "ex" is short for "executed," so that's there for yous.
I went on a date with an Eastern European chick. She got mad because I rushed her...
Get it? It's Russia, and I rushed her.
Me and a girl went on a walk...
Then she noticed me, then we went for a run. :)
Meeting a girl at the park is good. But parking meat in a girl is better.
What is Armin Meiwes' ideal date? Dinner.
Chat date for Gwen and Tj.
Hi, I'm a girl gamer looking for a hot bf.
Hello.
Anyone does online dating and needs someone? HERE I am!
Hello, I'm Ariana. I'm looking for someone. Anyone wanna date me?
Ariana
Girl: Rip, mother, I love you.
Me: Sorry for your loss.
Girl: Stop, I have a boyfriend.
Me: Stop, I have a mother.
So 666-3629, so get it?
Chase cheated on Charlie with Addison Rae.
Are you a Chipotle bowl? Because I wanna eat you out.
What do you call a person who tries to get you on a dating website... a Brodie.