Dating jokes
I will give you all the fine chicks you want. Just dial this number: 313-974- tap that ass from Hooters strip club.
I just figured out the "X" in Max stands for the button on Tinder every girl wants to press when they see him.
What is white, blue eyed, blonde haired and somehow was made in Galilee during the Roman occupation?
An Italian Renaissance painting that was carbon dated.
What do you call butter without an expiration date?
A miracle butter, because wow!
I like my boo like I like my packages: straight out of the box.
Why were you born?
Because I asked out your mom on accident.
So, I went up to an Australian girl. She looked like she was 20, and I said, "Can I have your phone number, sweetheart?" She said, "696969." I said, "Oh, haha, okay." A few days later, her mother called me and said she's 15.
One day a woman met with a man behind an abandoned shop.
The man asked for some crack.
The woman turned around and said, "Here."
That's where the crack was, you guessed it.
The next day, she wiped it clean, ready for the next guest who "wanted crack."
Question: What is the BIG ADVANTAGE to going out on a date with a "Homeless Chic"?
Answer: After the date, you can "Drop Her Off" ANYWHERE!
On my Tinder profile, I said, "I prefer quality over quantity." I just thought it sounded nicer than saying "no fat birds."
Me: And this is the room I cry in.
Date: You've said that about every room.
Me: Correct!
I asked my phone why I couldn't get a date.
It showed a picture of myself.
Me and a girl went on a walk...
Then she noticed me, then we went for a run. :)
When you have an ex, you will notice that the word "ex" is short for "executed," so that's there for yous.
Meeting a girl at the park is good. But parking meat in a girl is better.
What is Armin Meiwes' ideal date? Dinner.
Hello.
Anyone does online dating and needs someone? HERE I am!
Hello, I'm Ariana. I'm looking for someone. Anyone wanna date me?
Ariana
Girl: Rip, mother, I love you.
Me: Sorry for your loss.
Girl: Stop, I have a boyfriend.
Me: Stop, I have a mother.
Chat date for Gwen and Tj.