Dating jokes
What's the difference between my girlfriend and my sister?
There is no difference.
I once dated a math teacher. It turned out she was nothing but problems.
Hey! My name is Microsoft. Can I crash at your place tonight?
Are you suicide, cause you’re always on my mind?
There are plenty more fish in the sea is the last thing you should say to a necrophiliac.
What happened when the fire used Tinder?
He luckily got a lot of matches.
How did the Iron and Gold start dating?
They met on TINder.
So I saw a 15 year old kid near a 15 year old girl checking her out.
Then I told him, "What are you doing?"
He told me he will decorate her locker, donate a lot of money to her, and buy her a lot of stuff.
He then told me how easy would that be?
I told him: "That sounds pretty SIMPle."
What do you call butter without an expiration date?
A miracle butter, because wow!
My girlfriend accused me of cheating, and I said to her, "You're starting to sound like my wife."
Boy: Hey! I love you...
Girl: Eww, you are so ugly.
*boy sent a pic of his dic*
Girl: Beauty doesn't matter in love.
Pickup line: Are you the internet? 'Cause I feel a connection.
Dating a girl and studying mathematics, both give a headache.
My love life.
Are you a race car?
Cuz I’m tryna fuck.
What's the difference between you and eggs? Eggs get laid.
Chase cheated on Charlie with Addison Rae.
I like this Russian girl, but she hasn't asked me to hang off a cliff while drinking vodka.
There is this cute Russian girl in my class, yet she hasn't asked me out for vodka.
They told me I'd never be good at poetry.
But to date I have made 3 jugs and a vase, and they look lovely!