Crime jokes
Yesterday, there was a blackout on my street.
So I sold them.
Why do more men than women support abortion? So they can keep raping women and the victims will just abort their kids to not have to relive the experience!
They laughed at my crayon drawing.
I laughed at their chalk outline.
Why did the orphan rob the bank?
Because he wanted to be wanted.
Are you a gun, because I would be your bullets because I love going in children.
Title
"It's not a war crime if you win the war."
- Sun Tzu, The Art of War
Why do most clips for automatic weapons have 32 bullets?
That's usually how many kids are in a classroom.
What do you call a terrorist that can fly?
A dart.
How does a peadophile help a kid with maths? He adds the bed, divides the clothes, and multiplies with the whole classroom.
Leo: Mom?
Mom: Yes!
Leo: Is rape good?
Mom: NO!
Leo: Good cause I raped someone!
Mom: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!
What's the difference between a drug dealer and a prostitute?
A prostitute can wash its crack and sell it again.
What happens when you find a bomb at your local bazaar?
It becomes a flee market.
Obesity kills thousands of times more Americans than shooting does, which teaches us an important lesson:
Shooters do poorly given the size of their targets.
What's black and white and red all over? The prisoner I just hit with my car.
You're so damn ugly that the robbers only go into your house to close the blinds.
Not a joke, but this needs saying. Please can someone do something about all the pedo posts on here. It’s honestly just nasty.
"Why did the band teacher get arrested?"
"For fingering a minor." Ahaha, so funny!
My wife wanted to make a joke about domestic abuse, but I beat her to it.
What's a pedophile's favorite part of Halloween? Free delivery.
My life #freemymanrkelly