Complaint jokes

If I slap an orphan, what will it do, tell its parents? 🤣😂🤣😂

A man boards a plane with six children of various ages.

After the plane takes off, a woman sitting behind the man asks him, “Are all of them yours?”

“No,” the man responds. “I work for a condom company and these are some of the customer complaints.”

Mary Poppins went to a restaurant and ordered cheese, eggs, and cauliflower. When she left, she had written something in the complaint box: "Super cauliflower, eggs, but cheese was quite atrocious." (Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious)

Alles tut weh.

Smack an orphan, what’s he gonna do... tell his parents?

If you're bored, joke about an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?

Little Johnny got a train set for Christmas. He takes it around the circle, parks it at the station, and says, "Alright, you motherfuckers get off here, and you motherfuckers get off here." His mom comes rushing in and says, "Little Johnny, we don’t use that kind of language, go to your room and think about what you did!"

After a few hours, she lets him out of his room. He goes back to play with his train set. He takes it around the circle, parks it at the station, and says, "Okay, you guys get off here, and you guys get off here. And if you have any complaints about the two hour delay, take it up with the bitch in the kitchen."

This isn't even a joke, honestly. Rape victims bitch all the time, and they have a god complex. Hope they go through it again.

Why do I go around making orphan jokes? Because they can't go crying to their parents. 😅

A friend called me a while back saying, "I have COVID.... I can't breathe, I really have a hard time breathing."

I reply saying, "Dude, you need to work on your George Floyd jokes."

My wife complained about me being childish. So I told her to get out of my fort.

What did the wire say to the electrician?

"Stop twisting my nuts!"

I was thrown out of the charity food kitchen on my first night of volunteering.

All I said was, "Hurry up, some of us got homes to go to..."

I hate noise.

Why do sisters hate you?

Because you're their favorite stepbrother :P

What did the grape say when the fox stepped on it?

Nothing, it just let out a little wine.

I complained to my dad why he never took me to the zoo.

He said if they want you, they’ll come get you.

Why did the twin towers complain to the pizza restaurant?... Because they ordered pepperoni pizza and got plain.

A man complains to a slave dealer: "The slave you sold me died!"

"By the gods," replies the dealer, "he never did that when I owned him!"

What did the rapper say to the computer?

“Yo, stop laggin’ my FLOW!”