Has anybody noticed that the New York City football team is the New York Jets? They sure know how to scare the twin towers.
what is the only place fat people live? obi-city
What happens at night in Bangladesh? -- It gets Dhaka.
Are people from Hamburg called Hamburgers?
Last word of mayor of Hiroshima: ‘what the fuck was that noise?’
The teacher asked the class to use the word “fascinate” in a sentence
Molly put up her hand and said, “My family went to my granddad's farm, and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating."
The teacher said, “That was good, but I wanted you to use the word ‘fascinate,’ not 'fascinating'.”
Sally raised her hand. She said, “My family went to see Rock City and I was fascinated.”
The teacher said, “Well, that was good Sally, but I wanted you to use the word ‘fascinate’.”
Little Johnny raised his hand, but the teacher hesitated because she had been burned by Little Johnny before. She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word “fascinate,” so she called on him.
Johnny said, “My aunt Carolyn has a sweater with ten buttons, but her tits are so big she can only fasten eight!”
The teacher sat down and cried.
Why go across town when u can go across the hall?
A lady from the city and her traveling companion were riding the train through Vermont when she noticed some cows. "What a cute bunch of cows!" she remarked. "Not a bunch, herd", her friend replied. "Heard of what?" "Herd of cows." "Of course I've heard of cows." "No, a cow herd." "What do I care what a cow heard. I have no secrets to keep from a cow!"
My family chastises me for MY job, but you should hear how my family provides "customer service" at their jobs. My mother works as a social worker and answers the phone like, "DYFS, you beat em, we treat em." My grandmother is a Medical Examiner and she answers the phone like, "City Morgue, you kill em, we chill em." These bitches have no class! I'm an actress and studio secretary. When you call the studio, I answer the phone professionally like, "Good afternoon. IHOP, International House Of Pussy. Creampie Cassie speaking".
Teacher: we are going to Seville Girls: Omg it's such a beautiful city I cant wait to explore Boys: Ohh oh oh ohhh Omg thanks for 1000 likes
What time when the terrorist get to new york city? 9:11am
in what city do you always loose your mum Mumbai
Scoucer at ground zero just after the twin towers fell asks a passer by what time is it mate? American replys thats a mad accent were are you from ? Scoucer says liverpool american oh what state is that in? Scoucer looks around and says about the same state as this mate but what time is it?
A person in NYC is shot every 5 minutes. Poor guy.
This pastor decided to skip church one sunday morning and go play golf.
He told his assistant that he wasn't feeling well. He drove to a golf course in another city, so nobody would know him.
He teed off on the first hole. A huge gust of wind caught his ball, carried is an extra hundred yards and dropped it right in the hole, for a 450 yard hole in one.
An angel looked at God and said "What'd you do that for?" God smiled and said "Who's he going to tell?"
Time to go to New York to visit the twin towers.
They’re already getting closer
Why do New Yorkers get what Spider-Man is saying?
Because he always makes spider-sense.
What's the city with the fastest growing population? Ireland cuz it's Dublin everyday
It’s disappointing that Los Angeles doesn’t offer better transportation, especially since my neighbor offers free mustache rides every night.
The view is so much better without those twins covering the city
-well that was a blow up
