Emo chick: "I wish i could feel dead inside" The kid named dead: "😄😄😄"
I fucked a chick named Macy, but she had dyslexia.
So I ended up doing the YMCA.
Is it classed as down under if you eat out an Australian chick?
Mrs Kadie- I just heard about a FGTEEV video about vegan nuggets. Duddy- sup FGTEEVERS me and James Marsden just got some Chick-filla. Viewers- Got ya again Mrs Kadie . Mrs Kadie- Vincent and James I am going to push you off your roof Duddy and James- AHHHHHHH
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
what do eating a watermelon, rolling a cigarette, and eating a hippie chick out have in common. spit, spit, spit
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
What's the difference between a hippie chick and a can of spam After 6 months in the woods you'll still eat the can of spam
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
I will give you all the fine chicks you want just dial this number 313-974- tap that ass from hooters strip club.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
I went on a date with an Eastern European chick she got mad because I rushed her....
Get it's Russia and rushed her
What's a native chick say after sex? Get off me dad you're crushing my smokes
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To checkout the chicks
Two lawyers are sitting on a park bench and these two beautiful women walk by. The first lawyer says to the other, “Let’s go fuck these chicks.” The second lawyer says, “Outta what?”
A Chinese moves to the USA after 50 years of living in Shanghai.
He bought a home on a small piece of land.
The friendly American neighbor decides to go across and welcome the new guy.
He goes next door but on his way up the drive-way he sees the Chinese man running around his front yard, chasing about 10 hens.
Not wanting to interrupt these 'Chinese customs', he decides to put the welcome on hold for the day.
Next day he decides to try again, but just as he is about to knock on the front door, he looks through the window and sees him urinate into a glass and then drink it.
Not wanting to interrupt another 'Chinese custom', he decides to put the welcome on hold for yet another day.
A day later he decides to give it one last go, but on his way next door, he sees the neighbour leading a bull down the drive way and then put his left ear next to the bull's butt.
The American dude can't handle this, so he goes up to the Chinese man and says, "Jeez man, what the hell is it with your Chinese customs? I come over to welcome you to the neighborhood and see you running around the yard after hens. The next day you are pissing in a glass and drinking it and then today you have your head so close to that bull's butt, it could just about shit on you."
The Chinese man is very taken back and says, "Sorry sir, you no understand, these no Chinese customs I am doing, these are American Customs."
'What do you mean' says the neighbor, "Those aren't American customs."
"Yes they are, man at travel agent tell me" replied the Chinese man. "He say to become true American, I must learn to chase chicks get piss drunk and listen to bull-shit!"
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because the chicken had 4 chicks and a cheating hen who all sucked out all his money he got from his extremely boring job, and he finally got some peace for himself and was going to the local bar, which was on the other side of the road. He walked in the door, wings sagging, feathers catching on his claws. The bartender eyes him as he sits on a bar stool. "Chuck, how ya doin'? The missus doin' good?" "Just give me the hardest stuff you got. I'm done." This caught the bartender by surprise. "Chuck, come on, don't be sayin' that. Just look to the future and you'll be fine." "What future?" Chuck replied in a huff. "My wife and chicks are so goddamn pestering sometimes, you know? But if I leave, they'll all suffer, and I don't want that either. Oh, God, Phil, I don't know what to do." "You know, you've got a good heart for a rooster your age," Phil answered. "We need that in these parts. I'm tellin' ya, there will be more than what's happenin' right now, ya know, life's got all its gears turning for ya, and there's just a bit slow right now. The gears haven't been oiled in a while, but who's the only one who can fix that?" Chuck knew the answer. "Me." Phil returned with his drink. "McClucken's Whiskey, on the house." Chuck glanced at his glass. He held it up to the light. His face reflected in an aura around it, neither looking forward to the light and not backward, either. "No thanks, Phil," Chuck sighed, "But thanks anyways." He went to get up out of his chair. Phil called as he walked out the door, "Just remember to oil the gears every now and then, eh?" Chuck's comb flapped in a cool breeze brought in by the season. A bench was nearby, staring across to the other side. And he just sat there, sat there thinking. Cars blurred to a colorfully colorless nothingness as he thought in silence. He could see an open window in his mind, full of chickens: a sassy hen, two identical sportish chick; another, older than the two, and body bristling with blue comb-dye and the latest thing he watched online fresh on his Chickstagram page; finally, the first of the bunch, shy, bookish, with a secretly courageous soul. They all looked... worried, worried for the rooster who guided them, helped them grow, supported them... and all looking out of the window back at him. A single tear welled in Chuck's eye. The chicken walked back across the road to his family, to his friends, and to the life he was content with.
Peaches-REMAKE-By-Justin Beiber and watersharky Music Productions- I got my peaches out in Georgia (oh, yeah, shit) I get my weed from California (that's that shit) I took my chick up to the North, yeah (badass bitch) I get my light right from the source, yeah (yeah, that's it) And I see you (oh), the way I breathe you in (in), it's the texture of your skin I wanna wrap my arms around you, baby, never let you go, oh And I say, oh, there's nothing like your touch It's the way you lift me up, yeah And I'll be right here with you 'til the end I got my peaches out in Georgia (oh, yeah, shit) I get my weed from California (that's that shit) I took my chick up to the North, yeah (badass bitch) I get my light right from the source, yeah (yeah, that's it) You ain't sure yet, but I'm for ya All I could want, all I can wish for Nights alone that we miss more And days we save as souvenirs There's no time, I wanna make more time And give you my whole life I left my girl, I'm in Mallorca Hate to leave her, call it torture Remember when I couldn't hold her Left her baggage for Rimowa I got my peaches out in Georgia (oh, yeah, shit) I get my weed from California (that's that shit) I took my chick up to the North, yeah (badass bitch) I get my light right from the source, yeah (yeah, that's it) I get the feeling, so I'm sure (sure) Hand in my hand because I'm yours I can't, I can't pretend, I can't ignore you're right for me Don't think you wanna know just where I've been, oh Done being distracted The one I need is right in my arms (oh) Your kisses taste the sweetest with mine And I'll be right here with you 'til end of time I got my peaches out in Georgia (oh, yeah, shit) I get my weed from California (that's that shit) I took my chick up to the North, yeah (badass bitch) I get my light right from the source, yeah (yeah, that's it) I got my peaches out in Georgia (oh, yeah, shit) I get my weed from California (that's that shit) I took my chick up to the North, yeah (badass bitch) (I get my light right from the source, yeah, yeah) I got my peaches out in Georgia (oh, yeah, shit) I get my weed from California (that's that shit) I took my chick up to the North, yeah (badass bitch) I get my light right from the source, yeah (yeah, that's it) I got my peaches out in Georgia (oh, yeah, shit) I get my weed from California (that's that shit) I took my chick up to the North, yeah (badass bitch) I get my light right from the source, yeah (yeah, that's it)
