Character jokes
How do you make a pink Smurf?
You peel the skin off.
Mickey and Minnie are getting a divorce. The divorce lawyer says to Mickey: "Mickey, you can't divorce Minnie because she is crazy," to which Mickey responds: "I'm not divorcing her because she's crazy, I'm divorcing her because she's f**king Goofy."
[God creating a jellyfish]
God: How about an evil bag?
What is the difference between Bin Laden and Santa? One stops at the top of the skyscraper.
What’s Brock from Pokemon's favorite food?
Brockoli.
Why is he called Ben 10? Because he is ten in long.
Back in ancient Greece, there was a Greek Skyrim, but instead of FUS ROH DAH, the main character said, "Me damnit, Ganymede, get the #10 lightning bolt, I hate it when Helios lets his kids drive!"
If you don't get this, look up the story of Phaethon, and if you STILL don't get it, then you are dumb.
After watching Star Wars 8, I have to say Snoke was half the man I expected him to be.
Porky
Maybe I’ll be Tracer.
I’m already Tracer!
What's the difference between a yandere and a gun?
Nothing.
Flip them off the wrong way and you're dead.
Q: What's a German's favorite Undertale character?
A: Gaster.
What do you call an ugly, grey thing?
Cinderelephant!
Wait, isn't this Sans' job to make a joke?
What is Mr. Incredible's biggest fan now called? Down Syndrome :)
Kid: "I wish I could be like Batman!"
Genie: "Wish granted!"
When the kid gets home, both of his parents are dead.
Me: What’s that girl’s name from Phineas and Ferb, the sister?
Crush: Candice.
Me: Candice dick fit in your mouth?
Crush: *slaps me, walks away*
What is sprinkled around the Pokémon floor? Oh right. Ash's ashes.
Q: What is the best Disney character?
A: Toe Mater.
A mosquito with a Mario hat on flies on you saying, "It's-a me, Malario!"