I wasn’t staring, I was just trying to figure out if that was your hairline or the Great Wall of China.
What do you call a girl with an hourglass figure? -- A waist of time.
(me)I know why u don't have friends. (kid) why? (me) because u can't even figure that out.
Opposite day be like in doors
Figure : finally I can see
Eyes: Nnnnnoooo I'm blind. Figure I'm sorry i made fun if u all those other times pls don't make fu. Of me
Figure: ok eye promise eye won't.
Eyes: 😭
Your mum is so smart but she still can’t figure why she had you
is that a person over there Na its jesus
what do you call a stupid mannequin? a dummy
I couldn’t figure out why the football kept getting bigger...then it hit me
I am still trying to figure out why paying the covid doctors a complement is so offensive. They even kicked me out and all I said was to stay positive...
My friend loves playing Roulette, so I figured I would introduce him to Russian Roulette. Blew his mind.
How did they figure out what kind of shampoo Paul walker used? They found his “head and shoulders” in the the dash.
I wasn't staring at you I was trying to figure out if that's your forehead or the moon
My friend entered a pun contest. He entered ten, figuring at least one of them would win, but no pun in ten did.
I figured out why everyone is buying toilet paper because a huge rock is headed towards earth and paper covers rock
What did the orphan get for Christmas? Lego figures from his friend but they ran way too.
Me: Now knowing why Michael Jackson turned white.
The police: You finally figured is out.
What did the blind kid get for Christmas? He hasn’t seen it yet...
What did the kids with no arms get? He doesn’t know, he’s still trying to figure out how to open it. :))))
Why couldn’t people use the George Floyd action figure? Because it was vacuum sealed
I figure it's ok to hit orphans What are they gonna do? Go tell their parents?
You: Finds a time clock that can change time
Your friend the next day: Hey, can borrow yo' house
You: No I'm trying to figure out what to do with my TIME
Also you: Changes the time back to 1267 so you don't have to have that friend again
