John: Hi, boss, it is raining heavily today, so I will not be coming.
Boss: You stated in your job application that swimming was your hobby, so see you at 11 AM.
Kid: How much do you get paid?
Teacher: Minimum wage.
My dad was a roof cleaner and I'm dedicating this to him, so dad, if you're up there!
What's the difference between your job and a dead hooker?
Your job still sucks.
I am up in the air about becoming a pilot.
I have a great job for you, but you have to start it off...
Knock, knock...
Who's there?
I don't know?!?
At a date:
He: "I work with animals every day."
Me: "Oh, how sweet! What do you do?"
He: "I'm a butcher."
How does an artist fill in a CV?
He draws on experience.
What's the best thing about being a pedophile? You can choose the fit profession where you find kids most.
What was Frankenstein's second job? -- He was a bodybuilder.
They used to laugh when I said I wanted to be a comedian.
Well, they're not laughing now!
I used to be a banker...
But then I lost interest.
