Can jokes
WOW! I CAN SEE THE TWIN TOWERS FROM HERE.
Where can you donate an aborted fetus?
Your local pizzeria.
What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and a tap?
The tap can run.
"You can drink drinks, but you can't food foods."
-Sun Tzu, The Art Of Food
Can you imagine The Count from Sesame Street having sex? "1 orgasm..., 2 orgasm..., 3 orgasm..., ah ah ah!"
I want to be like pizza so I can get cut into 8 pieces.
I can tell you used to be friends with your hairline, cuz it goes way back.
"Banjo players spend half their lives tuning... and the other half out of tune."
I'm a banjo picker, and I can confirm this is 99% true.
Which country can swim?
Finland. Get it? Fin Land?
How can you tell that a woman is asking for sex? Wait for her to drop a bomb on you.
I have an account at the website Memedroid.
My name is J0K35FromWJE.
Feel free to follow me, and I WILL upload to Memedroid (I might not upload daily).
I will still make jokes here jlyk (just letting you know).
Ok here's your joke now...
What did one pizza say to the other when they were in bed?
"Can I have a pizza that ass?"
Why can you say "Kobe" even though you missed?
Because he didn't land either.
Can you f**k out of here?
Karen says:
Teach a Scouser to fish and he can eat for a day.
Give him the rod and he will stick it in your letterbox and nick your car keys!
A black dude shows up to a job interview for a watermelon farmhand gig, resume full of fried chicken joint experience. The boss asks, "Why should I hire you?" He stutters, "Uh, I got skills in... uh..." Before he can finish, a hulk-like, veiny, muscular, giant transgender man storms in, straps him to the interview desk with velvet cuffs, drips hot wax on his back from a candle shaped like a massive dick, and rams his ass relentlessly while whispering, "Welcome to the team, bitch. Your probation starts now."
I’m lost. Can you give me directions to your heart?
Why can orphans only use Samsung?
Because they don't have a home button.
Kid: I want to be like Batman.
Genie: I can make arrangements. The kid comes home, both of his parents are dead.
Genie: I told you.
Kid: .............................................
Q: What's the difference between a CEO and a beer can?
A: Beer cans don't bleed when they get shot.
You're so ugly whenever you say hi, people walk away and say that you were too ugly, and they go take a bath right away because you're so stinky.
They say that you look like your mama. Wait, your mama must be just like you because I can see her way from a mile!
You say you put on perfume, but every time I smell you, you smell like poo-poo. You're so ugly that when your mom looks in the mirror, you cry. You're so stupid the second-grade teacher had to tell you to go all the way to kindergarten. Head Start is every grade below you. You can't even go to the 20th grade, which stands for 9th grade. You can't even go to grocery stores, and people that tell you that you're so ugly give you compliments just to make you feel better. You know that everybody just likes you just because they just don't want to hurt your feelings, so just stay in your mind. Hey, you want to text Matt; you know it was you because every time you see you, you think that you matter. Matter fact, he doesn't even like you; he just wants your money girl. Who even likes you? 😈😈