Can Crushing Factory

Okay, listen up, you knucklehead. You think this is funny? You're just sitting there, probably still wearing pajamas, and not working. You think because you had a job at a can crushing factory, which, let's be honest, is not a real job, that you know what it's like to struggle and you quit. And then you said it was "soda-pressing", like it's a big deal. A soda, the thing that goes in your fridge, is not a big deal. It's a pun, get it? This is an elementary school level of humor. You need to step up your game.