Can jokes
Yo mama so fat you can see her from 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 galaxies away!
What has to be broken before you can use it?
Answer: An egg.
Why do Chinese people like playing Among Us?
It’s the only place they can vote!
Flex tape can fix a sawed-in-half boat. Then how the f*** can it not fix the Titanic when it broke in half? Tell me!
Why do orphans like boomerangs?
Because then they can play catch.
British people r so dumb dang
Some marriages can make short people look like Shaquille O'Neal.
Can you tell me the real answer to this joke?
What do you call a drone that takes the long way around?
Can you guys comment on my nuts jokes (aka Willma, Bofa, and Savor)? I just want to see if people don't think it's funny.
Why do orphans become hookers?
'Cause they can call someone "daddy."
A sister went to her brother's room and says,
"I'm scared, can I sleep with you?"
"Yes, sis."
"What is this?" (pointing at his dick)
"My pet snake."
"Can I pet it?"
"Yes."
He wakes up in a hospital.
"What happened?"
"Your snake spit on me, so I bit his head off."
"You dummy!"
"Whaaat?"
Stephen Hawking can pass any test, but there's one test he can't pass. It is the PACER test.
Boy: Hello, Mom, can I have $50?
Mom: Does it look like I am made of money?
Boy: That's what M.O.M. means, right?
I had morning wood one day. Then my sister saw it and said, "I can help!"
Why can orphans never walk home?
Because there's no way to go.
Would you rather have ten babies in one trash can or one baby in ten trash cans?
Hey, Tanya, can I Tanya ass?
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Madam.
Madam who?
Madam foot got caught in the door, can you please open it!
Are you Shane Dawson?
Because I can be your pussy.
A man is on his deathbed in prison by electric chair.
The man who controls the chair asks for any last words.
The prisoner replies with: “Can you hold my hand?”
What's one thing you can say about your house, but not your girlfriend?
"I wish it were this color, why is it leaking there, I need help trimming the grass I mean bushes, I own it."