Broke jokes

What did the rapper say when he broke his mic?

"Looks like I dropped the mic... literally!"

A blonde really got tired of all blonde jokes and decided to hang herself in the bathroom. As she locked the door, she yelled at her husband, "I'm hanging myself because I'm tired of jokes about us blondes being stupid!" Her husband broke into the bathroom and saw his wife with a rope tied on her toe. The husband said, "I thought you were hanging yourself." She said, "Yes, I am!" The husband replied, "Usually when people hang themselves, they tie the rope around their neck, so why is yours tied on your toe?" She said, "I tried that, but I couldn't breathe."

I asked Daveon if he ever considered trying something new, and he replied "why fix what ain't broke?"

"Daveon, stop screaming for help because I broke your kneecaps!"

What did the rapper say to his BROKEN PENCIL?

"You broke the beat!"

What did the autistic kid say to his girlfriend after they broke up?

"I thought what we had was special!"

How do you know if a rapper's broke?

When he starts dropping cents instead of bars.

If I had a dollar for every time a rap hater made an intelligent statement, I’d be more broke than the rap haters.

Fat jokes and mom jokes😂

1. So fat when she sat on the toilet, she said, "A B C D E F G, get your fat ass off me."

2. So fat, your dad and her were in bed and tried to kiss. He’d have to slap her belly and ride the third wave up.

3. Yo mama so fat that when she went to Japan in a green bikini, they all started yelling, "Godzilla, Godzilla."

4. Your mama’s so fat when she went bungee jumping, she broke the bridge!

5. Bill was so fat when he stepped on the scale, it said "to be continued."

6. Yo mama so fat, she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller.

Your cut [is] so broke, even Bob the Builder can't fix it.

Not a joke but there's nowhere else to post this, (mainly this post is for the broke people without a gym). Did you know that the body can't tell if you're using weights? So lifting weights are optional.

Some beginner workouts without weights for like really weak people:

1. Sit-ups 10 reps 2. Push-ups 20 per reps 3. Squats 10 per reps 4. Crunches 10 per reps

Yo momma is so fat, when she tried to hang herself, the noose broke.

I met a girl that was 6'5" and she fell on 9/11 and broke her arm. She really said "oh snap" like a twin tower.

Lucifer's so broke he can't even afford air conditioning units.

Your so broke your mom can't afford your daddy.

One time I broke a leg and I was using a wheelchair.

My parents thought I was a disappointment and put me up on eBay, the Ohioan Black Market, and the nearest adoption center.

I was falling down the stairs at my local clock tower.

I somehow broke more than 206. I broke 342!

My girlfriend just broke up with me because I held a door for another girl. She said I was cheating, but the girl I helped was in a wheelchair.

Q: How do you know if an Asian broke into your house?

A: All your homework and the Rubik's cube you spent a year on and still can’t solve is solved. 🤓🤓🤓🤓

I broke up with my girlfriend and stole her wheelchair.

Guess who likes vegetables now?