You have thin feet that people think you were a duck.
What did the poo say to the ass?
"I left you."
Why does Barry Bannan laugh when he plays football?
Because the grass tickles his balls because he's so short.
What was the guy with no arms, legs, or a head name?
Matt.
I have to call Bovfa. What's Bovfa? Bovfa deez nuts fit in your mouth.
Have you heard of the man who got all his left side chopped off?
He was all right.
Your mum's got big tits.
Pooooooooooop!
What do you say to a foot that got beaten at everything?
De-feeted (Defeated)
Why is the skeleton sad and alone?
Because he is with nobody.
Balls in your jaws.
What do you call the most famous skeleton detective?
Sherlock Bones!
Fat moms.
Penis and balls.
Yo mama is so fat, she had to snap his finger twice.
A woman walks out of the shower, winks at her boyfriend, and says, "Honey, I shaved myself down there. Do you know what that means?"
The boyfriend says, "Yeah, it means the drain is clogged again."
An old woman walked into a dentist's office, took off all her clothes, and spread her legs. The dentist said, "I think you have the wrong room."
"You put in my husband's teeth last week," she replied. "Now you have to remove them."
A penguin takes his car to the shop, and the mechanic says it'll take about an hour for him to check it. While he waits, the penguin goes to an ice cream shop and orders a big sundae to pass the time. The penguin isn't the cleanest eater, and he ends up covered in melted ice cream. When he returns to the shop, the mechanic takes one look at him and says, "Looks like you blew a seal."
"No," the penguin insists, "it's just ice cream."
If your Uncle Jack was on his roof, and he wanted you to help him down, would you help your Uncle Jack off?
A family's driving behind a garbage truck when a dildo flies out and thumps against the windshield. Embarrassed, and trying to spare her young son's innocence, the mother turns around and says, "Don't worry, dear. That was just an insect."
"Wow," the boy replies. "I'm surprised it could get off the ground with a cock like that!"
My penis.
Why does shit come out your asshole? Cause fuck you, that's why.
Verga.
What did Stephen Hawking love that couldn't move?
Himself, ps particularly his whole body. I was gonna say his legs, but then I remembered he was fully paralysed and was like shitttttttttttttttttttttttttttt.
