Body jokes
What is 6 inches tall when bricked up and is loved by women?
A strong man’s biceps.
A dark sense of humor is like a pair of functioning legs. Not everybody has one.
I hate double standards. Burn a body at a crematorium, you're "being a respectful friend." Do it at home and you're "destroying evidence."
Hi guys, I am Logan Taub the toad. I just want to say that my cock is so, so, so tiny. It could fit 50 times in the crack of my butt chin!!!!! Also, I am trans👍
Yo mama so fat that when she fell on the concrete, nobody laughed, but the concrete cracked up.
My arm has a different texture than the rest of me, lol.
You're so fat when you told your mum and dad, even they laughed!
Sex is basically math. You add the bed. Subtract the clothes. Divide the legs to multiply inside.
Sometimes I look around and all I see is two fat cheeks in my face and say, "Too mushy apples."
(Best pick-up line ever). Your body is like 9/11. I wanna crash into your twin towers. 😏
Male Patient: So, I just pull my pants down and bend over for this prostate exam?
Doctor: Yep.
Male Patient: Ok, I'm ready. Hey! That doesn't feel like a finger.
Doctor: Yep, and I'm not even a doctor.
What’s the difference between a fetus and a woman?
A fetus has more rights.
Your mama is so fat, when she stepped on the scale the doctor asked for her weight, not her phone number.
I yo yo-yo yo-yo yo-yo, yo-yo yo-yo you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you ha! Frick, fuck, gosh dang, you’re so big that you can’t ride. This is Builder.
My thighs have a different texture pack than the rest of me.
There once was a man who beat his wife, And before he even knew it, he ended her life. His hands were a mess, all red and bloody, He had to find somewhere to hide the body.
You're so fat when you walk into the mall, you *are* the mall.
You don't have to worry about running while boys are around. Even I can't see anything there.
When your boy tries to have a bad day while you're on your period:
Oh, you have a cold? How rude of me. I just laid an egg, and now my body is ripping down the walls of my uterus. But can I get you a tissue?
Yo ass so fat that you can't see your toes.
When you go to the movies, you take up seven rows.