Biology Jokes

Your gene pool is so shallow, you could break your neck diving in.

Daughter: So, I got my period.

Mom: That's wonderful, dear! Now you can bleed for a whole week a month without dying!

Daughter: That's nice, Mum, but isn't the whole point of getting your period dying?

Mom: Yes, but you have to kill yourself a little longer to live through to another day.

Daughter: Thanks, Mum. That makes a whole lot of sense. (Sarcastically.)

Mom: You're welcome, honey. (Clueless, obviously.)

What did the cell say when it was dividing?

"It's not you, it's me."

What do you get if you cross a zebra and a donkey?

Zeedonk.

What do a moose and a triceratops have in common?

Both have noses.

Why did the bat cross the road? Because to get to the blood bar.

I fed some chickens some eggs. They ate them. Nothing else to explain except they are cannibals.

What do you get if you cross a loaf of bread with a vagina?

A yeast infection.

Me: What is the difference between your mom and a mosquito?

Friend: Let me guess, they both suck you.

After seeing you sing, the dog got disinfected from rabies.

You call me a prostitute's son, I call you test-tube babies.

There were three babies in a mom's stomach. One baby asks, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" The other baby answers, "A doctor. I want to help people. What about you?"

"I want to be an engineer. I want to make things. What about you?" he asks to the third baby.

"I want to be a hunter."

"Why?" the other babies ask.

"I want to kill the snake that spits on my face."

What did the cell say when his sister stepped on his foot?

Mitosis!!! (my-toe-sis)

On Paxomedy channel, I made a video of a Rooster and a dog fighting.

I needed to know why they were fighting. Once I dug down into the issue, it turned out that the Dog called the Rooster a Cock, and the Rooster laughed and called the Dog a useless Bitch, and that was the beginning of their fight, and weird enough, the Cock won!

I went to congratulate the winner, but he thought he was insulting me by calling me Zinjathropus, but I said that was a compliment because Zinja was an old skeleton found in Africa, and I am African. I said to the Rooster he shouldn't have fought with the dog just because he called him a Cock. He said that being called a Cock is a compliment, and the fighting was his exercise to toughen up for serious fights with Dogs!

What did the dog say to his sister when she stepped on his toe? "Hey, mitosis!"

There was a penguin breathing with his ass. One day, he sat down and he died.

What do you get when you cross a cow with a fish?

A genetically unstable animal that is impossible and would die instantly upon existing. If it could live, it would be a deformed, parasitic tumor that undulates through people.