Beverage jokes
A guy went to the doctor and told him that whenever he drinks a cup of tea, his eye hurts. The doctor brought him a cup and asked him to drink. When he finished, the doctor told him: "From now on, take off the spoon."
Q: What will we give to a sick lemon?
A: Lemon aid.
Why does the orange 🍊 beat the other fruits 🍎 in every race?
Because it never runs out of juice.
What do you call a cow that just gave birth?
Decalffeinated.
Yo mama so stupid... She tried to climb...
Mountain Dew!
How do you make a fruit punch?
You give it a pair of boxing gloves.
What is a cow's favorite drink?
Mountain Moo!
What's thick and has ice in it when you take it out of a blender?
A baby smoothie.
If tomatoes are a fruit, does that mean ketchup is a smoothie?
What do you call a white person having a seizure?
A vanilla shake.
Why did the coffee file a police report? -- Because it was mugged.
I'll never forget how my grandmother died. "This lemonade tastes like bleach..."
Yesterday, a guy threw a liter of milk at me.
How dairy!
Yo mama so stupid, she stared at a juice box because it said concentrate.
What does a kid and wine have in common?
Shit, I forgot, but they're both locked in my cellar right now.
If drinking alcohol makes you an alcoholic, does drinking Fanta make you fantastic?
What do you call a sad cup of coffee?
Answer: Depresso.
What do me and Monster cans have in common? A barcode.
What is an orphan's favorite beer?
"Fosters."
What's a depressed person's favorite drink?
Depresso expresso.
JK, it's bleach.
Community talk
why does iced coffee cost more than hot coffee when most of the time you’re getting either the same amount or sometimes even less
2-3 bananas (3 is best but two is fine) 1 and 1/2 milk 3 tablespoons maple syrup (4 if you want it sweeter) 2 cups of ice
MY AMAZIN SISTER GOT ME FOODZ AND ENEGRY DIRNK. YUM YUM YMMMM IEHFIDHVESODUHFWOIEOIDS