Beverage jokes
Math riddle: If I have 12 bottles of wine in one hand, and 9 in the other, what do I have?
I hope you have to dip your Oreos in water because your dad never came back with the milk.
Q: What’s Jackie Chan‘s favorite drink to have at a bar?
A: Wo-Tah!
What is the sweat between Dolly Parton's boobs?
Mountain Dew.
Yo mama so stupid, she made an appointment with Dr. Pepper.
What is a rabbit's favorite drink? Hare wine.
What kind of mountain does everyone like?
Mountain Dew!!! Hahah.
How do you call somebody who has bought a Corona?
A Cor-owner.
Why did Marx never drink Earl Grey?
Because proper tea is theft.
There was a Cheerio that had a job. He worked hard at it, and the boss came up and promoted him to the vice president of the Cheerios. So he needed a speech. He kept practicing and practicing and now he was thirsty. It was almost time for his speech, so he went to the drinking fountain, but there was a huge line. So he went to the lake, but he saw tons of garbage and what he thought was a cereal killer. So he found this bowl of punch, but he realized... there was no punchline.
Jack and Jill went up the hill, both had Bacardi rum. When Jill's was gone, she wanted Jack's, that's why she took it from him.
If people who live in Canada are Canadians, I mean if they drink Fanta, they’re fantastic.
A man tried to attack me with milk and cheese—how dairy!
I go to the shop and buy 2 pints of kimo.
What’s a rapper’s favorite kind of SODA?
Dr. Dre Pepper.
A man walks into a bar with a piece of asphalt under his arm. The bartender asks what he wants. The man says, "I would like one beer for me and one for the road."
Fanta Klare Zitrone is cool.
When they spilled coffee on his neck, he got hot under the collar.
My dad went to go get milk.
I woke up when I heard a strange noise coming from my kitchen.
I turned on the light, and I saw none other than the exposed flop GHOSTNALDO. He asked me if I had PenalTEA, his favorite drink. I said no and yelled, "There is a big game tomorrow!" and he disappeared.