Beverage jokes
What is it called when a gay guy punches someone?
Fruit punch.
What did the grape say when he got squished? Nothing, he just let out a little wine.
What is the favorite drink of a vampire?
bloody mary.
Why is drinking soda so sad?
It's soda-pressing.
What is your true crush?
A soda crush.
My chocky milk, don't you touch my chocky milk! It's mine! No it's not! It's your face! Ccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccchhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooccccccccccccccccccccccckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
A drunk walks into a bar and sees a beautiful woman at the other end of the bar and says, "Bartender, I want to buy that douchebag a drink."
The bartender says, "You can't talk like that! This is a respectable establishment, I'm going to throw you out!"
The drunk says, "Okay, I'm sorry. I'd like to buy the lady a drink."
The bartender goes to where the woman is sitting and says, "The, ah, gentleman at the end of the bar would like to buy you a drink, what will it be?"
She says, "Vinegar and water."
Two gay kids made their version of the Jack and Jill nursery rhyme.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pair of lattes.
Why does Doctor Pepper come in a bottle?
His wife died.
I like wine how I like my woman.
4 year old locked in a basement.
I wanted some breakfast, so I grabbed some Life cereal.
I poured it, but lemons came out. So I said, "Well, when life gives you lemons!"
Yo mama so stupid... She tried to climb...
Mountain Dew!
The difference between women and beer is that beer makes you happy for nothing, why women make you angry for nothing.
Math riddle: If I have 12 bottles of wine in one hand, and 9 in the other, what do I have?
Q: What’s Jackie Chan‘s favorite drink to have at a bar?
A: Wo-Tah!
What is the sweat between Dolly Parton's boobs?
Mountain Dew.
Wanna hear a joke? You need some milk.
What is a milk?
Milk!!!!
I had a glass of Schweppes lemonade in one hand and a glass of R. Whites in the other. I got into a hot sweat. I think I have Corona Virus.
I hope you have to dip your Oreos in water because your dad never came back with the milk.